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Archived Post 01-30-2010 03:05 PM

Official Corny Joke Thread
I will get it started.

Two birds on a perch one says to the other "can you smell fish?"


Two fish swimmiing along, one bumps into a wall and says "Dam"


Two fish in a tank, one says to the other "Can you smell Diesel?"

Archived Post 01-30-2010 03:06 PM

Two cannibals are eating a clown and one says to the other, "Does this taste funny to you?"

Archived Post 01-30-2010 03:07 PM

Two protons are talking. One says to the other, "I think I lost an electron." The other says "Are you sure?"

The first says "I am positive"

Archived Post 01-30-2010 03:09 PM

id tell a corny joke but all i have is a potatoe :(

Archived Post 01-30-2010 03:10 PM

Two Houseflies land on a freshly laid dog poop and start eating. The first fly burps loudly and the second says "Do you mind, I'm eating!"

Archived Post 01-30-2010 03:11 PM

Why did the koala fall out of the tree?
It was dead.

Why did the second koala fall out of the tree?
He got hit by the first koala.

Why did the third koala fall out of the tree?
He thought it was a trend and joined in.

Why did the Kangaroo die?
He got hit by three falling koalas.


Archived Post 01-30-2010 03:12 PM

A guy walks up to a gal in a bar and takes a seat. As he turns to her he asks:

"Excuse me miss, but, you wouldn't know how much a polar bear weighs would you"?

The gal, looks at him strangely, not at all expecting this question and reply's:

"No, I don't I'm sorry".

He immediately smiles and reply's::

"Enough to break the ice, My name is..."

Archived Post 01-30-2010 03:12 PM

I'll get me coat...
What does Captain Kirk have in common with toilet paper?
They both go around Uranus wiping out Klingon's

Archived Post 01-30-2010 03:13 PM

A romulan, a klingon and a Gorn walk into a bar....
Ah... you've heard this one.

Archived Post 01-30-2010 03:13 PM

Two strings go into a bar. The bartender throws them out, as they do not serve strings.

One of the strings arches his back and walks in on all fours. The bar tender "asks are you a string?" The string replys, "no I am the letter m." The bartender replies "you are a string get out of here!"

The second string gets an idea, bends over into a loop and messes up his hair, then goes into the bar.
The bartender says "hey, are you one of those strings?"

The string replies, "no, I am a frayed knott..."

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