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Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 1 My Fellow Klingonians...
04-28-2011, 11:20 AM
My fellow Klingonians, read my lips: no new pvp content! Wait that's not it... oh yes it is... whatever...

I did not have dishonorable relations with that gorn... Wait that's not it either...

What? You want me to produce my birth certificate?

Oh yes, here it is. No, trust me it does not say Romulus in PoB (Planet of Birth)...

Anyways... to those of you who still believe in pvp and enjoy stalking live prey, I salute you. To those who enjoy stalking... um... entities that belong in the matrix (pve), I shall collectively address you as Mr. Alexander Rozhenko.

To those not named Alexander, please do read on.

Stahl has proclaimed that we will have access to a Klingon Academy! Hooray! Wait, we already have that don't we? It's just called the "PVP queue." As you advance through different tiers of ships, the academy will always be available to you. For those of you who are coming up the ranks for the first time, I would like to give you some advice.

One: please please please please do NOT kirk it up and engage the enemy alone. Your name is not Kirk. You will never have his strange way of talking. You will never score with as many alien females as he did...

Do you know why most feddies get owned by the Kobayashi Maru scenario? It's cause it pits their lone ship against a whole team of klingons. Kirk won cause he used the Konami Code to get 30 lives...

I've seen countless klingons become very entertaining explosions because they choose to kirk it up and engage solo against a group of 4 feddies. Those feddies are armed, and yes if you underestimate them they will kill you. These are not like the feddies we blow up in Alexander Rozhenko missions ("defend the empire!" or star cluster hulabaloo).

Yes, while leveling we WILL have to level up like Alexander these days because let's face it, Cryptic has left pvp like Worf left Alexander to his parents. That's why Alexander is Alexander. Just keep in mind there's no plot immunity for klingons, there never was.

Two. Don't participate in taunting, unless you see the feddie alt of one of your klingon fleetmates ( / target Dumar...).

I've seen feddies cry and whine, and taunt so they can feel superior.
I've seen klingons cry and whine, and taunt so they can feel superior.

Oh very well, participate in psychological warfare if you must, it's fun to do yes. But don't fall victim to getting steamed up and blinded by rage when they do it. Just send them erotic tells... huh?

Three. Don't be cemented into thinking x build is always superior, and don't hesitate to strike up a conversation with the guy that just smoked you. You can reach max level, but you'll always be able to learn from any encounter. Klingons who get blinded by builds are the ones Alexander and Wesley Crusher (the feddie Alexander) pwn.

Four. The team chat is there for a reason eh? Please coordinate

Five. Don't become like Alexander and be deluded into thinking you're the HERO! Don't save your support abilities to only yourself. Likewise, don't bother with that Alexander teammate of yours when he charges at full impulse right at the feddie ball. Nothing will save him. Use your brains for each situation!