Reviews of pending Foundry Missions - Anyone waiting for 5 reviews
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Join Date: Dec 2007
11-02-2011, 02:57 AM
THE COLA FACTORY - BY FURRY ANGEL
Project ID: STHHEB58EEU
I hope you are reading this after the review I left of your mission.
Its a pretty good space/ground/interior mission - very similar in structure to my first one.
However it needs a little bit of fine tuning.
1.I am assuming the Kola Pirates are after the Cola Factory? In the mission text you said the head of
was requesting aid from the Federation. I assume that should be the head of Cola?
2.The enemies are all Klingon? I assume they are actually Kola Pirates (?) If so then they need renaming in the editior.This can be done by selecting the group in the list.Click the little drop down arrow and you should see Actor #1,Actor #2 etc. If you then change the `Contact` field to `Kola Pirate` or whatever then thats how they will show up in the game. Also you can do the same with the ships and call them `Kola Fighter/raider` or whatever.
3. It might be an idea to use the `Generic` ships by clicking the `Costume` tab on the Actor# .There are quite a few variations - maybe have a little fighter or crusier instead?. They will still fight like Klingons but look different.
4. Maybe cut down the number of space battles? seven is a bit much. I would suggest say 3 encounters with a crusier class ship supported by the second weakest fighter group. I think that would make it a bit more intense.
5. The spawns after you talk to `bunny` - owch ! Unless you are meaning for the player to get mown down in a hail of fire maybe a few less would be better? My char is a LC5 with mark IV armor ,Shields and Weapons and I got killed in like two seconds flat
6.I`m assuming the text on the `bench` should be `press the button to go inside` not vice versa?
7.On the subject of the bench - I`m assuming thats the actual factory entrance? maybe one of the small or meduim bases would look more like an actual factory (assuming the bulk of it is below ground?)
8. Lastly - maybe some more dialogue from your bridge officers? Ie when you get in system something like:
Bridge Officer Tac Ship "Sir I am detecting numerous Kola Raiders blockading the planet ! We will need to eliminate them before we can Beam down"
After the fight in orbit:
Bridge Officer Science "Thats the last of them [Rank] . I am getting a transmission from the planet,Putting it onscreen`
Bunny "Please you must come quickly.Kola raiders have landed and have taken control of the factory and surrounding area.You msut stop them! They have shut down production of the factory! It must be re started or our economy will be ruined !"
Then when you get to the planet and fight the raiders maybe the text on the building shoud say `enter the factory` or somesuch?
Anyhoo I hope that you take this in the spirit it is meant.You definitely have all the mechanics in place.Nagorak gave me similar advice which led to me totally altering my first mission. The best advice I can give is the same as before - Why does the player WANT to do this mission? Is there a logical reason ?
If Cola is for instance the planet Riza`s main export then they have a reason to help. Lastly I`m not sure but I think `Cola` is copyrighted (??) Maybe you could think up some alternate name for it?
All the best - one author to another