Things Captain Ratika is Not Allowed to Do
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Join Date: Dec 2007
02-29-2012, 02:47 PM
151). I am not allowed to tell aspiring engineers, the media or impressionable children that we literally shovel dilithium into the warp core 'like an old fashioned locomotive steam engine'. Neither can I imply that this is how Klingon anti-matter reactors work, true or otherwise.
152). I have been told on good authority that Tellarites, Ferengi and Pakleds do not like my rendition of the 'Oompa Loompa' song, and that I should cease humming in their presence immediately.
153). I am not allow to blast heavy metal music during red alert.
154). Iron Maiden's 'Run to the Hills' is not an acceptable fleet battle song.
155). Latinum is NOT a girl's best friend and I should not try to prove this theory.
156). When answering the question of an alien species in regards to what Starfleet or the Federation does, I am not allowed to quote Conan the Barbarian's answer to 'What is Best in Life'.
157). Whining 'But the Klingons get to do it.' will get me nowhere.
158). I first have to be a great starship captain in order to go to The Captain's Table. So I can forget it.
159). Don't ever call the Omega Force 'Klingon Lovers'.
160). I will never address my local Starfleet Intelligence officer as 'Herr Commandant'.