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Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
Quote:
Originally Posted by drogyn1701 View Post
I've got 2 for you Evil70th:

my latest:
Mission Name: Somewhere in Time
Author: Drogyn1701
Level 31+
Allegiance: Federation
ST-HSKGXR2GE
Estimated Mission Length: 30-45 Minutes
Federation Mission - Somewhere in Time
Author: Drogyn1701
Allegiance: Federation
Project ID: ST-HSKGXR2GE

----------Report Start-----------

Summary: This is a great mission with excellent map design, good mostly optional battles and outstanding dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors throughout the mission. You did a great job from concept to completion and I thoroughly enjoyed the mission. I would highly recommend this mission to everyone who likes a compelling story combined with excellent maps.

Below are a couple of items I noted while playing the mission that I wanted to let you know about. Everything in this write up should be seen as suggestions on ways I felt you could improve certain elements of the mission. They are yours to do with as you see fit.

Mission Description: This is a good mission description. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this description.

Grant Mission Dialogue: This is a good grant dialogue. Both the initial and the post "Accept" button dialogues are well written. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue.

Mission Task: Despite putting the start location of the first custom map in your Grant Dialogue you should also have it in the initial task.

Mission Entry Prompt: This is a good use of the prompt. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue.

MAPS:
Deep Space Nine Cargo Bay: This is a good simple map design and the dialogue is well written, but I am not sure this couldn’t be handled on the next map. If you added a little more story dialogue and/or some interaction, like having the player examine the equipment the Doctor wants beamed aboard.

Astrometrics Lab: This is a good map design. The story dialogue is very intriguing and well written. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.

Deep Space: This is an outstanding map design. The story dialogue is excellent. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.

U.S.S. Kansas Deck 15: This is a good map design. The story dialogue is well written. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.

[b][color="Red"]U.S.S. Kansas Bridge: This is a good map design. The dialogue is very intriguing and well written. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I noted only one item to consider changing:
-Consider making placing a map transfer point at the turbolift rather than triggering following the dialogue. It would flow better.

U.S.S. Kansas Deck 8: This is a good map design. The story dialogue is well written. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I noted one item to consider changing:
-Consider adding some fighting on the deck or more explosions as background to the story.

The White Room: This is a great map design. The story dialogue is very well written. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map

Deep Space (Present): This is a good map design. The story dialogue is very well written and a nice wrap up to the mission. I really liked the last response button. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.

---------End Report----------

Thanks again for authoring and for giving me the chance to review your work. You did a great job with the development of this mission. I look forward to playing/reviewing more of your work in the future.
Brian

This critique report also filed 05/12/2012 on forum posting for: In depth mission reports upon request.