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Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
Quote:
Originally Posted by Q400
I have two missions for you

Q400 Daily: Deals - Series 2
Level Requirement: Any
Faction: Federation
Handle: @Q400
Description:
For, " Investigate officer reports."
Federation Mission - Q400 Daily: Deals - Series 2
Author: Q400
Allegiance: Federation
Project ID: ST-HSTXOPOB4

----------Report Start-----------

Summary: This is a nice short mission. The map design is good with a nice battle and very little dialogue. I would recommend this mission to all players who like short missions. It is pretty straight forward with a nice single battle and very little dialogue.

I would recommend you decide if it is going to be a combat mission, a story mission, or a combination of both. Anyone of those elements by themselves or in combination will make the mission much more interesting to play. Finding the perfect balance between a short mission and a long mission can be difficult but the key is maintaining the players interest in continuing the mission no matter how long it is.

Below are few things I noted while playing the mission that I wanted to let you know about. Everything in this write up should be seen as suggestions on ways I felt you could improve certain elements of the mission. They are yours to do with as you see fit.

Mission Description: This description is a little short. Consider adding a little more to draw the player in and make them want to click that "Hail" button. I noted one item to consider changing:
-Consider changing "when a ferengi asks for help" to read "when a Ferengi asks for help".

Grant Mission Dialogue: The grant dialogue can be long or short and you are using a nice way to get the player to click the "Accept" button, but you need to add a little more to the post grant mission dialogue.

Mission Task: This is a good initial task as most players should know where Andoria is.

Mission Entry Prompt: This is a good use of the prompt. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this prompt.

MAPS:
Andoria: This is a nice map design with a good battle and limited story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I noted one item to consider changing:
-The Ferengi ship appears at the same time the Orion ships appear and continues to warp away during the combat. It felt a little odd. I would suggest having the player warp in and the Orion appear immediately since there is no story dialogue at the beginning. You could get rid of the Ferengi ship at that point as the player would be too occupied with the fight at hand to note the lack of a Ferengi ship. You could then cover it by expanding the dialogue at the end mentioning that the Ferengi warped away as the battle started.

---------End Report----------

Thanks again for authoring and for giving me the chance to review your work. You did a nice job developing this mission. I look forward to playing/reviewing more of your work in the future.
Brian

This critique report also filed 06/08/2012 on forum posting for: In depth mission reports upon request.