View Single Post
Starfleet Veteran
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 770
Quote:
Originally Posted by ajstoner View Post
Hey, Evil! Hope you have been well. You reviewed my mission "Finding resolution" a while back and I have a new one for you when you have a chance.

The Far wanderer
ID: ST-HFXJYEDSW
FACTION: Federation
LEVEL: 41+
PLAY TIME: Aprox. 40 minutes
GAME PLAY: Investigation, Exploration, some Space Combat, Dialogue Heavy.

Many Thanks, AJS
Federation Mission - The Far Wanderer
Author: ajstoner
Allegiance: Federation
Project ID: ST-HFXJYEDSW

----------Report Start-----------

Summary: This is a great mission with amazingly detailed map design, excellent story dialogue, and a few battles too. I would highly recommend this mission to all players who like a great story combined with great map designs and a few battles. This is not a combat oriented mission but is amazingly well done.

Below are a few issues I noted while playing the mission that I wanted to let you know about. Everything in this write up should be seen as suggestions on ways I felt you could improve certain elements of the mission. They are yours to do with as you see fit.

Mission Description: This is a very detailed description; however you should consider moving the actual mission description above the {MissionInfo) data. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this description.

Grant Mission Dialogue: This is a good grant dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue.

Mission Task: Consider adding the start location to the initial mission task. This will make it easier for players to play your mission. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this task.

Mission Entry Prompt: This is a good use of the prompt. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this prompt.

MAPS:
The Vorn System: This is a good map with a fun battle and excellent story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.

Alien Power Control: This is a fantastic map design with amazing detail. The story dialogue is very well written. I noted a couple of items to consider changing:
-The initial dialogue; consider changing "We have place your down in what seems to be" to read "We have placed you down in what appears to be".
-On some of the decks you used I noted a shimmer when I moved. This is caused by overlapping objects with similar texture. If you decrease their alignment of overlapping objects by .001 on the "X, Y, or Z" axis as needed should mitigate the effect.
-While the map design is outstanding and very detailed the BOFFs seem to have a hard time staying with me in some areas. This is okay as long as the player does not have to engage enemy mobs.

Alien Hydroponics Lab: This is a fantastic map design with amazing detail. The story dialogue is very well written. I noted a couple of items to consider changing:
-The initial dialogue; consider changing "This musty be the right place" to read "This must be the right place", unless you were making a joke about the age of the ship.
-As with the other map, the map design is outstanding and very detailed the BOFFs seem to have a hard time staying with me in some areas. This is okay as long as the player does not have to engage enemy mobs.

Alien Hibernation Chamber: This is a fantastic map design with amazing detail. The story dialogue is very well written. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I noted one item to consider changing:
-As with the other maps, the map design is outstanding and very detailed the BOFFs seem to have a hard time staying with me in some areas. This is okay as long as the player does not have to engage enemy mobs.

Alien Bridge: This is a fantastic map design with amazing detail and excellent story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.

Vorn XII Orbit: This is a good map design with several tough battles and well written story dialogue. I noted a couple of items to consider changing:
-The "Confront the Klingons" dialogue; consider changing "K'plah, [ShipName]" to read "Qapla', [ShipName]"
-Consider changing the response button "K'plah" to read "Qapla'".
-Consider having all enemy engagements take place in the same area around the alien ship. The last battle was very tough without support.

Epilogue: This is a good map design with well written story dialogue and is an excellent wrap up to the mission. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.

---------End Report----------

Thanks again for authoring and for giving me the chance to review your work. You did an amazing job developing this mission. I look forward to playing/reviewing more of your work.
Brian

This critique report also filed 10/21/2012 on forum posting for: In depth mission reports upon request.
If you would like a detailed review of your mission please visit my forum posting "In depth mission reports upon request" for details.