View Single Post
Starfleet Veteran
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 884
Quote:
Originally Posted by thegreendragoon1 View Post
You can add my mission to the list. Thank you.

Mission Name: In the Shadow of MIDAS, Part 1
Author: greendragoon
Minimum Level: 31+
Allegiance: Federation
Project ID: ST-HJ7NMF3PH
Estimated Mission Length: 60+ minutes
Method of Report Delivery: Forum post here is fine.

Description:
MIDAS, an experimental array once used to communicate with the U.S.S. Voyager while it was stranded in the Delta Quadrant. These days it's sending more than messages. You are called to discover the fate of two Federation starships that failed to return after venturing through an experimental wormhole to the other side of the galaxy. But in the far reaches of space, a darkness dwells and you may find that two lost ships are the least of your worries. Do you have what it takes to unravel the mystery and return home in one piece?

Comments:
This is the first of a 3 part arc. I'll warn you now, this means it's a cliffhanger. It's also designed for single player.

Forum thread here which includes the the trailer.
Federation Mission - In the Shadow of MIDAS, Part 1
Author: greendragoon
Allegiance: Federation
Project ID: ST-HJ7NMF3PH

----------Report Start-----------

Summary: This is an outstanding mission from the fantastic map designs, to the fun, balanced battles, through the excellent story dialogue. You did a fantastic job of drawing me into the story and keeping me riveted the whole time. I hardly noticed the mission length as I played through. I would highly recommend this mission to all players who love those elements in a mission.

Below are a couple of things I noted while playing the mission that I wanted to let you know about. Everything in this write up should be seen as suggestions on ways I felt you could improve certain elements of the mission. They are yours to do with as you see fit.

Mission Description: This is a good and intriguing description. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this description.

Grant Mission Dialogue: This is a good grant dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue.

Mission Task: This is a good initial task with a clear start location for the first custom map. I noted no spelling errors with this task.

Mission Entry Prompt: This is a good use of the prompt. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this prompt.

MAPS:
MIDAS Array: This is a nice map design with well written story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.

Admiral's Office: This is a great map design with excellent story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.

Through the Wormhole: This is a fantastic map design with a good battle and excellent story dialogue. The wormhole, rift, and warp effects are outstanding. I noted a couple of items to consider changing:
-Consider changing the response button "Continue" to read "On screen".
-The post "Exit the Rift" dialogue; consider changing "We're traveled over 73,000 light years" to read "We've traveled over 73,000 light years".

System R1-997: This is a great map design with excellent story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.

Ruined City: The map design is fantastic, especially the entry to the fallen starship. The battles are well balanced and fun. The story dialogue is excellent. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.

U.S.S. Persephone: This is an outstanding map design with well balanced battles and excellent story dialogue. I noted a couple of items to consider changing:
-The post "Return to Transport Site" dialogue; consider changing "I know your star sailors" to read "I know you star sailors".
-The post "Set Off Incendiary Charges" dialogue; consider changing the response button "Continue" to read "Let's get out of here".

System R1-997: This is a nice map design with a good battle and well written story dialogue. I noted one item to consider changing:
-The warp effect you used for the warp out does not work very well. If possible I suggest you reorient the map so the ship approaches the warp out from the west and use the "WeatherStarStreaks East-West 01" effect you used on the "Through the Wormhole" map.

Ship Interior: This is an excellent map design with outstanding story dialogue. I noted one item to consider changing:
- I do not see it as a problem, but some players may mention a problem with a Vulcan using contractions. It's something to consider.

Empty Space: This is a great map design with fun battles and outstanding story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.

---------End Report----------

Thanks again for authoring and for giving me the chance to review your work. The mission from start to finish is outstanding. I look forward to playing/reviewing more of your work in the future.
Brian

This critique report also filed 12/30/2012 on forum posting for: In depth mission reports upon request.
If you would like a detailed review of your mission please visit my forum posting "In depth mission reports upon request" for details. Also see Evil 70th's list of missions at "Evil 70th's Missions".