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Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 674
# 11
03-20-2013, 12:11 PM

Thank you for posting this! I have always wondered what the social and political situation on Cardassia was like, post-Dominion War, and your story gave us a very good glimpse into the "new" Cardassian mindset. The interactions between Gorel and Eren were really well written, and I really liked how you described the Yorktown-- probably one of the best starship descriptions I've seen in a while, especially since you successfully gave texture and rationale behind in-game effects and items (re: the Dominion pack).

Your story actually reminded me of one of the DS9 novels...I forget which one..which revolved around the premise of Bajor, similarly, building a Federation ship in the hopes of one day kickstarting its own shipyards again. I did, however, notice that you're plagued by the continuous problem of question marks popping up everywhere. My advice is to use Notepad to write your stories instead of Word, as then these issues don't pop up when you copy and paste.

Otherwise, I liked it! I hope to read more of your stuff in future.