Nothing major I can think of to add aside from transporter chief doesn't need a capital C, hyperspanner not hypo (I looked that up on memory alpha first ) also which rank of chief is he? When I write I introduce characters with their full rank. I just think it sets the character better, but that's just what works for me.
I originally thought your captain was Romulan when you said Vulcan cousins but it was interesting to make him an atypical Vulcan.
Is your Trill officer's name based on Jadzia Dax or is that just a coincidence I'm looking too much into?
I use a different site for mine, memory gamma, but I like pictures
Thanks for pointing that out for the spanner, I'm a big fan of Memory Alpha myself
I didn't go into too much detail about the transporter chief as I don't intend for him to really appear again and it was more of a "cameo" appearance.
And the name being similar to Dax, that was just coincidence, when I've being playing STO I've just gone for randomly generated names each time I gain a new crew member and that's what it came out with. I did consider changing it because of it's similarity but thought sod it.