Career Officer
Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 3,672
# 31
06-27-2013, 12:04 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by gorvar1 View Post
Here's a hint...read mine first ;D
Oh, very well.

Awesome story you wrote up there. I was really impressed by Gorvar's nagging self doubt, the bit of backstory about his own experience in an escape pod, and the end there with Krishna was really touching. You still have a few ?'s floating in there amid some other typos ("unphased" instead of "unfazed") but nothing to distracting. Great piece of work!


Now to the others...

@indyv72 - Very cool.

@sharpie65 - good story, intriguing ending, but as others have mentioned - the colors... Instead of using different colors to identify who's talking, just write it in. ("Aye-aye, sir," the helm officer answered.)

@ayel1 - welcome to the LCs and the forums! Great little log entry by way of introduction. But you'll notice all of the ? marks where apostrophes and quotes should be - to avoid that, don't do your typing in Word.

@masopw - THAT was very interesting! I enjoyed that immensely - thank you for sharing! Q, multiple realities, mirror universe, temporal paradoxes and red matter all at once? I think that has to set some sort of record...

@whytelyon - NICE backstory! I really enjoy your use of the Borg-ravaged universe in "Parallels" as your springboard. Though I fear your friends won't find this reality than much better...

@aetan66 - oh, you tease...

@hughkat82 - welcome aboard! Interesting bio there.

@cosmonaut and the others... I'll get to you later. I've got some writing of my own to do.
"Everybody Chill Out!"

"I'mma cold-blooded killer... Ha ha! get it?"

The Masterverse Timeline / Ten Forward Fanfics
Commander
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 422
# 32
06-27-2013, 03:59 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by jonsills View Post
The fallout of that story should be interesting, danqueller. I take it the Commander wasn't so thoroughly fooled as Rycho had assumed?
Well, Tosik certainly could have thought of it, but in his state of shock, it would taken a bit longer. Also, he knows he's already treading on thin ice, so ordering the transport of a fellow officer who can deny everything and had already proven adept at twisting events to his benefit would have been adding even more risk to his plate.

On the other hand, you don't get to be Commanding Officer without getting to know your crew, and being perceptive of the situation around you.
Captain
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 3,777
# 33
06-27-2013, 04:57 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by patchouli19 View Post
Woot, first lit challenge I actually got around to doing!
Welcome to the LCs Very cool entry, it's nice to see the return of the Xindi
Captain
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 3,777
# 34
06-27-2013, 04:59 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by danqueller View Post
Posted my entry. Will read over other entries soon, but I generally try to avoid doing so before my own is posted to keep the work clean of unconscious copying of other people's ideas and stories. Hopefully, I got the formatting so it is easier to read but not disruptive. Enjoy!
Very nice Rycho is fast becoming the breakout character, and the Commander still remains anonymous
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 226
# 35
06-27-2013, 05:56 AM
well got the first part up, tying several of my char's together. Going to try to get the rest of it up by this weekend. one things for sure, if Schrodi survives this, she's gonna have a lot of explaining to do when she hauls her ship back to ESD.
Captain
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 3,777
# 36
06-27-2013, 09:24 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by knightraider6 View Post
well got the first part up, tying several of my char's together. Going to try to get the rest of it up by this weekend. one things for sure, if Schrodi survives this, she's gonna have a lot of explaining to do when she hauls her ship back to ESD.
Fantastic, can't wait to read part two
Starfleet Veteran
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 571
# 37
06-27-2013, 09:59 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by knightraider6 View Post
well got the first part up, tying several of my char's together. Going to try to get the rest of it up by this weekend. one things for sure, if Schrodi survives this, she's gonna have a lot of explaining to do when she hauls her ship back to ESD.
Quote:
Originally Posted by marcusdkane View Post
Fantastic, can't wait to read part two
Neither can I, to be honest.

A really cool story, knightraider6. Definitely looking forward to reading the rest.
Originally KiraYamato before the Account Linking - True Join Date August 2008

"Close Air Support covereth a multitude of sins." - Maxim 4, The Seventy Maxims of Maximally Effective Mercenaries
Captain
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 3,386
# 38
06-27-2013, 11:59 AM
@knightraider - really looking forward to the conclusion. The "insane" running gag was nice, too.

@amurorx0 - intriguing. Cagalli's compensators must also be necessary to permit such a being to live in a universe with our laws of physics - a mass so great in such a small area should be collapsing into a singularity, or neutronium at the very least...
-------------------------------------------
I'm old enough not to care too much about what you think of me --
But I'm young enough to remember the future, the way things ought to be...

- Rush, "Cut To the Chase", Counterparts
Captain
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 1,974
# 39
06-27-2013, 12:18 PM
Good news...a story is indeed underway, though its scope is as yet unknown. Its title will be "Black Days," and it will start looking at the fallout of the Interdictor incident. Not sure yet whether I will go into the full Board of Inquiry or not (may not be able to complete research for that in time), but I have a definite idea of how to set up Alyosha's return to Earth for the inquiry.

Cookies to anyone who gets the cultural reasons I named the story what I did (and there is more than simply being ominous and suggesting this time will not be pleasant for Alyosha). It's a play on something...let's see if anyone can figure it out.

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Lt. Commander
Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 157
# 40
06-27-2013, 12:39 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by sander233 View Post

@masopw - THAT was very interesting! I enjoyed that immensely - thank you for sharing! Q, multiple realities, mirror universe, temporal paradoxes and red matter all at once? I think that has to set some sort of record...

.
Thanks, sander233!

Tried to pop the kitchen sink in there too, but it just wouldn't fit...

A least I didn't have them exceeding the max warp limit and devolving into some type of slug...that would have been absurd...

Seriously, glad you enjoyed it.

I had some delusuions of grandeur about trying to make that story a mission in the Foundry...and then reality slaps me upside the head with a clock, asking exactly how I planned on finding the time.
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