Starfleet Veteran
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 789
# 681
06-27-2013, 08:02 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by djf021 View Post
Thanks for the review! It always helps to know what people think. Thanks again!
Always happy to help. Wish I could play more.

Brian
If you would like a detailed review of your mission please visit my forum posting "In depth mission reports upon request" for details. Also see Evil 70th's list of missions at "Evil 70th's Missions".
Lieutenant
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 74
# 682
07-05-2013, 09:55 PM
Whats up evil? Me again. Just wanted to give you the heads up my mission is published again. So throw me back in the queue if you had to pass me up ^.^
Join Date: Dec 2009 <Actual Join Date)
My Foundry Missions:
The Wave Empire Series: http://sto-forum.perfectworld.com/sh...d.php?t=279751
Career Officer
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 925
# 683
07-27-2013, 07:49 PM
It's been awhile, O Evil One, but I have a new Fed-allied Romulan mission for you!

Title: "[Rom] Valley of the Shadow I" (aka "Into the Valley")
ID: ST-HBHYVOLP6
Author: @NCC-89471
Allegiance: Federation/Romulan
Level: 31+
Estimated play time: 60-75 minutes

You can post your feedback on this thread, or on the thread I created for the VotS trilogy I have planned.

Thanks again...
Starfleet Veteran
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 789
# 684
07-28-2013, 10:33 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by paxfederatica View Post
It's been awhile, O Evil One, but I have a new Fed-allied Romulan mission for you!

Title: "[Rom] Valley of the Shadow I" (aka "Into the Valley")
ID: ST-HBHYVOLP6
Author: @NCC-89471
Allegiance: Federation/Romulan
Level: 31+
Estimated play time: 60-75 minutes

You can post your feedback on this thread, or on the thread I created for the VotS trilogy I have planned.

Thanks again...
Hi Pax,

Welcome back to the long queue. Your mission will be 17th in the queue behind commodoreobvious. I have been very busy at work and have not been able to spend time working on missions as much as I would like to. It is still very busy at work but I am trying to make head way and will get to your mission as soon as I can.

Thanks for authoring,
Brian
If you would like a detailed review of your mission please visit my forum posting "In depth mission reports upon request" for details. Also see Evil 70th's list of missions at "Evil 70th's Missions".
Starfleet Veteran
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 789
Quote:
Originally Posted by uncle2fire View Post
Mission Name: Torg's Treason
Author: uncle2fire
Minimum Level: 16+
Allegiance: Federation
Project ID: ST-HENPNLRSY
Estimated Mission Length: 30-45 minutes

Hello there Brian, my name is Bryan Anywho, I published this mission a couple of weeks ago and got some feedback and updated things accordingly, so now I'm looking for some more opinions. Yours would be nice, especially because yours are so thorough This is my first mission, so I'd like to know how I can improve overall as well as the specific mission. For example, my story-telling, dialogue style, pacing, character design, etc. as well as anything about this specific mission.

Thanks a ton!

Thol Komihntra
Federation Mission - Torg's Treason
Author: uncle2fire
Allegiance: Federation
Project ID: ST-HENPNLRSY

----------Report Start-----------

Summary: This is a good combat oriented mission with good map design, several very tough battles, and well written story dialogue. The mission dialogue takes the player through each map from battle to battle, gathering information as you go. At the end of the mission it lives up to the title with the betrayal of the Klingons by one of their own and the aid of a valiant Federation captain in the restoration of Klingon Honor. I would recommend this mission to other players although not on Elite level.

I mentioned the puzzle in this mission. This part of the critique is not completely aimed at you the author but at all authors who like using puzzles in their missions. The puzzle in this mission, like so many others I have played, did not seem to really be needed as part of the story line. As I recommended below I liked the fact that you provided a "skip" option albeit after the player had attempted it at least once. I would suggest placing that option at the start of the puzzle. It would give the player the option to skip over and continue the mission. I understand that some players may like solving puzzles but it does absolutely nothing for me as I go through a mission except stop the flow of it. I do not play these missions so I can do math problems. If I wanted to do that I would not be trying to duck math classes as I go for my degree. The short answer here is for all authors who want to use puzzles in your missions you should provide the skip feature same as many do with dialogue, including myself. We give the player the option to skip the majority of the dialogue and receive a summary of information needed to proceed. The puzzles should be handled the same way.

Below are some things I noted while playing the mission that I wanted to let you know about. Everything in this write up should be seen as suggestions on ways I felt you could improve certain elements of the mission. They are yours to do with as you see fit.

Mission Description: This is a good description but you may want to cut down on the details about what you updated in the mission and add more of the story. The description should be used to draw the player in and make them want to click the "Hail" button. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this description.

Grant Mission Dialogue: This is a good grant dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue.

Mission Task: The initial task is good but consider adding the sector block to make it easier for the player to find where the first custom map starts.

Mission Entry Prompt: This is a good use of the Entry prompt. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this prompt.

MAPS:
Ponor System: This is a good map design with a good battle and well written story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.

Research Station: This is a good map design with several very tough battles and well written dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I noted one item to consider changing:
-I like the fact that you gave the player the option to skip the puzzle after the first attempt; however I think you should give the player the option to skip it from the start. I will cover this in more detail in my summary above.

Deep Space: This is a simple but good map design with very tough battles and a little story dialogue to move the mission forward. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I noted one item to consider changing:
-If you are going to place multiple enemy mobs on a map for the player to defeat consider moving them further apart to allow the player to use tactics to engage each enemy unit.

Aido System: This is a good map design with several very tough battles and well written story dialogue. I noted a couple of items to consider changing:
-The house of Martok Cruiser does not survive the second wave of the attack but Hol'eQ still talks to the player at the end of the final battle.
-Consider spreading out the enemy mobs to give the player a better chance to use tactics to defeat the enemy.
-In the first dialogue following the second wave of attack the enemy is named Horath, but in the second dialogue window he is named Korath as he was in the initial dialogue before the battles started.

---------End Report----------

Thanks again for authoring and for giving me the chance to review your work. You did a good job developing this mission. I look forward to playing/reviewing more of your work in the future.
Brian

This critique report also filed 07/28/2013 on forum posting for: Torg's Treason
If you would like a detailed review of your mission please visit my forum posting "In depth mission reports upon request" for details. Also see Evil 70th's list of missions at "Evil 70th's Missions".
Starfleet Veteran
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 789
# 686 The queue so far
07-28-2013, 11:11 AM
I want to start off by telling everyone in the queue how sorry I am it has been taking me so long to get to your missions. Between my real job and working at Comic-Con I have been very busy so my only time to play has been weekends. At some point I also have to cram my social life in there so I do not go crazy. I am not saying playing STO constantly is a bad thing but believe it or not I do have friends outside of STO. So anyway I am trying to get to the queue as fast as I can. This is the queue as it stands right now:

----------The queue-----------

Mission 1: Hostile Diplomacy Author: treky1134: This one is on hold as the author has not made it available. When it is available I will evaluate it but in the meantime I am skipping over it to complete other missions that are available in the queue.

Mission 2: No Prize for Second Contact II Author: Contactpsi: This mission has a glitch on the Chapter V, Heservat III map with the initial spawn point placing the player inside a rock. I have notified the author to fix and let me know when it is ready for me to continue. When it is available I will evaluate it but in the meantime I am skipping over it to complete other missions that are available in the queue.

Mission 3: Secrets Ahead Author: Kempoh: With the other mission on hold this one will be the next in line for completion.

Mission 4: Overture 6: Finale with Cannonade Author: KineticImpulser

Mission 5: The Writers of History Author: Donkyhotay

Mission 6: GRIZZ's Farmer - The Siren Star Author: chitowngrizz420

Mission 7: Cero Troubles Author: CougarXLS

Mission 8: All Roads Lead To Rome Author: horriblecat

Mission 9: Admiral in Peril v1 Author: antman9173

Mission 10: Task Force Sol Author: usmcprim

Mission 11: A time to search Author: lincolninspace

Mission 12: Eternal Madness Author: dewey001

Mission 13: Contact Squared Author: eldil1

Mission 14: The Beta Rana Incident Author: marhawkman

Mission 15: The Wave Empire Ep.5 Author: skyline45

Mission 16: Violations and Resistance Author: commodoreobvious

Mission 17: "[Rom] Valley of the Shadow I" (aka "Into the Valley") Author: NCC-89471

-----------The End------------

Thanks for authoring,
Brian
If you would like a detailed review of your mission please visit my forum posting "In depth mission reports upon request" for details. Also see Evil 70th's list of missions at "Evil 70th's Missions".
Ensign
Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 15
# 687
07-29-2013, 10:45 AM
Just wanted to let you know I updated the start position for my mission and it is now the Burgus system in the Borg sector
Ensign
Join Date: Jun 2013
Posts: 8
# 688
07-30-2013, 12:09 PM
Brian - very gracious of you to offer to do this, and in such detail. This is my first Foundry attempt, though it has progressed through a couple major edits based on feedback and personal play-through and reflection. Begins in Q'onoS (shipyard, console behind the ship repair engineer). I appreciate it!


Mission Name: Imperial Incursion
Author: shillelagh73
Minimum Level: Any, ideally 50.
Allegiance: Klingon
Project ID: ST-HP7S8HVR6
Estimated Mission Length: 15-20 minutes (standard difficulty)
"Shut up, Wesley!"

Last edited by vaelinpaladin; 07-31-2013 at 07:10 PM. Reason: Changed mission name.
Lieutenant
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 97
# 689 Missions to review
07-31-2013, 08:50 PM
Hello, Evil 70th, I have a couple of missions I would like for you to review, I will give you the information that you will need.

Please note, Part one starts at the end of my other series and this part continues the story but playing the other series is not needed but you might be confused.
__________________________________________________ ________________________

Mission Name: The Fvain Group part one. ( Most of this mission is done in flashbacks)
Author: Logitech007
Minimum Level: 31+
Allegiance: Federation
Project ID: ST-HUUBIG8KJ
Estimated Mission Length: About 45 min to an hour. Depends on you.

Story:From the Borg---Jem' Hadar battle crisis came a group of officers who are plotting the downfall of the Federation by any and all means. They have triggered some sort of splinter group. Enemies are now allies and allies are now enemies. Can you put a stop to this before this group successful. If they are, what will be the balance of power be like in the area? Where did this group come from and who leads this group? How big is this group? The answer may or may not surprise you.

Starting place: Wall console just outside of the Transporter room on Earth space dock.
__________________________________________________ ________________________

Mission Name: The Fvain Group part Tne. ( You will need a shuttle for one part of this mission, the game will tell you when you need it.)
Author: Logitech007
Minimum Level: 31+
Allegiance: Federation
Project ID: ST-HFIPWJ7A5
Estimated Mission Length: About 30-45 min.

Story: Now we know who in Starfleet's Echelon is part of the Fvain Group, but does it going further up the chain then some of its command officers. Are there more misguided officers who are plotting? Who will we enter into a temporary alliance with, The Romulans or the Klingons, to put an end to this and will this new alliance push the Federation across the line that they can not undo or will the ends justify the means to whatever the length Starfleet will go to end this threat once and for all? Another player is revealed.

Starting place: Wall console just outside of the Transporter room on Earth space dock.
__________________________________________________ ________________________

Thank you for taking the time to play and review my missions.

Thanks
Logitech007
Lieutenant
Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 34
# 690
08-08-2013, 02:19 PM
Thank you for posting the current queue, I appreciate knowing where I am in line. We also understand you have a real life besides STO and that it takes awhile to test everything and I am grateful for the time you do spend doing this.
Do not be afraid to joust a giant just because some people insist on believing in windmills.

Check out my foundry mission "The Writers of History".
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