Starfleet Veteran
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 151
# 871
01-08-2014, 12:39 AM
Hello, I'd very much appreciate you trying my mission if you have the time:

Mission Name: Futility
Author: @elzombie
Minimum Level: 41+
Allegiance: Federation
Project ID: ST-HDZVFBBD2
Estimated Mission Length: Took me around 45 minutes, without the hidden surprises (there's only six so don't waste too much time looking for them!)

I hope you enjoy playing it as much as I enjoyed making it.
Join Date: AUG 2008 / Fleet:4077th
Captain
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 5,409
# 872
01-08-2014, 03:13 PM
Mission: Time's Eye
Faction: Fed
Author: voporak
ID: ST-HN4LHQZHT

Sequal to Of Terror and Darkness. It's currently still in production, but by the time it gets its turn to be reviewed it'll be done, with bugs hammered out.
Quote:
Originally Posted by askray View Post
YAY I'M EVOLVED! *drools on his chin*
Quote:
Originally Posted by voporak View Post
Welcome to the STO forums, where the evolutionary clock ticks backwards.
Empire Veteran
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 9,681
# 873
01-08-2014, 03:33 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by creamyzombie View Post
Hello, I'd very much appreciate you trying my mission if you have the time:

Mission Name: Futility
Author: @elzombie
Minimum Level: 41+
Allegiance: Federation
Project ID: ST-HDZVFBBD2
Estimated Mission Length: Took me around 45 minutes, without the hidden surprises (there's only six so don't waste too much time looking for them!)

I hope you enjoy playing it as much as I enjoyed making it.
I recommend this one personally.
King of Lions rawr! Protect the wildlife of the world. Check out my foundry series Perfection and Scars of the Pride.
http://sto-forum.perfectworld.com/sh...1#post13990891
Starfleet Veteran
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 847
# 874
01-09-2014, 05:15 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by creamyzombie View Post
Hello, I'd very much appreciate you trying my mission if you have the time:

Mission Name: Futility
Author: @elzombie
Minimum Level: 41+
Allegiance: Federation
Project ID: ST-HDZVFBBD2
Estimated Mission Length: Took me around 45 minutes, without the hidden surprises (there's only six so don't waste too much time looking for them!)

I hope you enjoy playing it as much as I enjoyed making it.
Hi elzombie,

Welcome to the queue. Your mission is currently 14th in the queue behind Logitech007. I hope to get back into the queue this weekend and will get to your mission as soon as I can.

Thanks for authoring,
Brian
If you would like a detailed review of your mission please visit my forum posting "In depth mission reports upon request" for details. Also see Evil 70th's list of missions at "Evil 70th's Missions".
Starfleet Veteran
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 847
# 875
01-09-2014, 05:19 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by voporak View Post
Mission: Time's Eye
Faction: Fed
Author: voporak
ID: ST-HN4LHQZHT

Sequal to Of Terror and Darkness. It's currently still in production, but by the time it gets its turn to be reviewed it'll be done, with bugs hammered out.
Hi voporak,

Welcome back to the queue. This mission is 15th in the queue behind elzombie. I hope to make some progress on the queue this coming weekend and will get to your mission as soon as I can.

Thanks for authoring,
Brian
If you would like a detailed review of your mission please visit my forum posting "In depth mission reports upon request" for details. Also see Evil 70th's list of missions at "Evil 70th's Missions".
Starfleet Veteran
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 847
# 876
01-09-2014, 05:20 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by ashkrik23 View Post
I recommend this one personally.
Thanks for the endorsement of elzombie's mission. It is appreciated.

Thanks for authoring,
Brian
If you would like a detailed review of your mission please visit my forum posting "In depth mission reports upon request" for details. Also see Evil 70th's list of missions at "Evil 70th's Missions".
Starfleet Veteran
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 847
Quote:
Originally Posted by councilspectre View Post
Hey Evil!

The third act of my mission series: No Prize for Second Contact is finished and I'd love another of your spectacular reviews:


Title: No Prize for Second Contact III
ID: st-hnnh00vxu
Author: Contactpsi
Allegiance: Federation
31+
45 minutes - 1 Hour
Federation Mission - No Prize for Second Contact III
Author: Contactpsi
Allegiance: Federation
Project ID: ST-HNNH00VXU

----------Report Start-----------

Summary: This is a great mission in the series and thoroughly enjoyable throughout. The map designs are really good, the battles are tough but fun and the story dialogue is excellent. I was riveted by the stories and thoroughly enjoyed being able to choose different options within the dialogue. I would highly recommend this mission and the series to all players who like the combination of good maps, some fun battles, and excellent story dialogue.

Below are a couple of things I noted while playing the mission that I wanted to let you know about. Everything in this write up should be seen as suggestions on ways I felt you could improve certain elements of the mission. They are yours to do with as you see fit.

Mission Description: This is a good description. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this description.

Grant Mission Dialogue: The grant dialogue is well written and to the point. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue.

Mission Task: This is a good initial task with a clear start location for the first custom map. I noted no spelling errors with this initial task.

Mission Entry Prompt: This is a good use of the prompt. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this prompt.

MAPS:
Chapter I, Bridge: This is a good map design with excellent story dialogue. I noted one item to consider changing:
-The Major Torval dialogue; consider changing "Starfleet would send no diplomats or vessels to treat with the Heservat" to read "Starfleet would send no diplomats or vessels to meet with the Heservat".

Chapter II, Mess Hall: This is a great map design with good player decision mapping and excellent story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I noted one item to consider changing:
-Consider changing Crewman Barnes dialogue to optional triggered dialogue. Since the NPC is standing in the player's path triggered dialogue would work well. It would then disappear after the player interacts with it.

Chapter III, Sickbay: This is a good map design with excellent story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.

Chapter III, Transporter Room: This is a good map design with excellent story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. . I noted one item to consider changing:
-The map name is "Chapter III, Transporter Room" and the previous map is named Chapter III, Sickbay". Consider changing the current map to read "Chapter IV, Transporter Room".

Chapter IV, Future's Council: This is a good map design with tough but fun battles and excellent story dialogue. I noted a couple of items to consider changing:
-Since the previous map is incorrectly named consider changing this map name to read "Chapter V, Future's Council".
-The Council Engineer dialogue; consider changing "even if I were promitted to tell him" to read "even if I were permitted to tell him".

---------End Report----------

Thanks again for authoring and for giving me the chance to review your work. You did a great job developing this mission and the entire series so far. I look forward to playing/reviewing the next installment in the series. I would like to suggest that you combine all your individual mission postings into a single posting. This would give you a chance to advertise all of them even if you only update one.
Brian

This critique report also filed 01/18/2014 on forum posting for: No Prize for Second Contact 3
If you would like a detailed review of your mission please visit my forum posting "In depth mission reports upon request" for details. Also see Evil 70th's list of missions at "Evil 70th's Missions".

Last edited by evil70th; 07-03-2014 at 09:18 AM.
Starfleet Veteran
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 847
Quote:
Originally Posted by djf021 View Post
Hello Evil,
I'd love for you to review my new mission.

The Bajoran

Faction: Federation (Designed primarily for Fed captains)
Mission ID: ST-HNWVU9YX3
Author: djf021
Level: 31+
Play time: Approximately 1 hour-1 hour and 15 minutes

Description:

You are called upon to deliver an accused killer to Cardassia Prime to face his charges. However, what should be a simple trip quickly turns troublesome...and not everything is as it seems!

Thanks for your time and for the great reviews!
Federation Mission - The Bajoran
Author: djf021
Allegiance: Federation
Project ID: ST-HNWVU9YX3

----------Report Start-----------

Summary: This is a great mission with good map designs, several fun battles, and excellent story dialogue. I would definitely recommend this mission to other players who enjoy a good balance of those elements. In short the mission was enjoyable from start to finish.

As I mentioned on a few of your maps the use of NPC optional dialogue vice triggered dialogue should be changed. The use of the triggered optional dialogue vice NPC optional dialogue allows you to create side story dialogue, which may add to the story but is not required to complete a map. I typically use the 10FT invisible object for triggered dialogue and tasks. Some objects and tasks need a little adjustment in when they become visible or disappear. For optional dialogue a couple of things to consider are the dialogue should only remain visible if the player may need to refer back to it. Otherwise it should be removed. Optional dialogue that remains after it is of no use to the story detracts from the story. That is one of the reasons I push the triggered optional dialogue and discourage the NPC optional dialogue. In the end it is up to you how to handle the dialogue.

The final item is the use of map space. I enjoyed your use of map space for the "On the way to Cardassia" and "On the way to Cardassia once more" maps. I have seen a lot more mission where the author is using these effects to help tell the story. On both of these maps you use the "Weather Starstreaks North South" effect with the entire map oriented to the north and south. I have found that effect does not work well unless the player is at "Full Impulse". That is why I usually recommend the "Weather Starstreaks West East 01" effect with the map oriented east to west. The effect works well at any speed as the streaks flow from west to east regardless of the players speed. Otherwise the battles on those maps worked well and can easily be reoriented to the east to west.

Below are some things I noted while playing the mission that I wanted to let you know about. Everything in this write up should be seen as suggestions on ways I felt you could improve certain elements of the mission. They are yours to do with as you see fit.

Mission Description: The description is good but consider adding a few more details about the story. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this description.

Grant Mission Dialogue: This is good grant dialogue but you may want to add a little more story to draw the player in. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue.

Mission Task: Consider adding the start location to the initial mission task. I noted no spelling errors with this task.

Mission Entry Prompt: This is a good use of the prompt. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this prompt.

MAPS:
Conference Room: This is a good map with excellent story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.

On the way to Cardassia: This is a good map design with balanced battles and excellent story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I noted one item to consider changing:
-The "Weather Starstreaks North South" seems to be bugged with the streaks going both directions at regular impulse. Consider changing your map orientation to a westerly orientation and using "Weather Starstreaks West East 01" effect. It looks more like warp space then the other.

Captain's ready room: This is a good map design with excellent story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I noted one item to consider changing:
-Consider making optional dialogue triggered so it disappears after the player interacts with it.

On the way to Cardassia once more: This is a good map design with balanced battles and excellent story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I noted one item to consider changing:
-The "Weather Starstreaks North South" seems to be bugged with the streaks going both directions at regular impulse. Consider changing your map orientation to a westerly orientation and using "Weather Starstreaks West East 01" effect. It looks more like warp space then the other.

Guest quarters deck: This is a good map design with balanced battles and excellent story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I noted a couple of items to consider changing:
-Consider making optional dialogue triggered so it disappears after the player interacts with it.
-Consider changing the map transfer button from "Continue" to read "Enter the meld".

Mind meld!: This is a good map design with excellent story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I noted one item to consider changing:
-Consider changing the map transfer button from "Continue" to read "Leave the meld".

Guest quarters deck#2: This is a good map design with excellent story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.

Asteroid field: This is a good map design with balanced battles and excellent story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.

Asteroid Facility: This is a good map design with tough but fun battles and excellent story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I noted a couple of items to consider changing:
-Consider adding a block that prevents the enemy mobs from being engaged until the last dialogue is complete.
-Consider changing the map transfer button from "Continue" to read "Energize".

Asteroid field#2: This is a good map design with excellent story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I noted a couple of items to consider changing:
-The initial dialogue; consider changing "One the other hand" to read "On the other hand".
-The Captain Hernandez dialogue; consider changing "We were sent to excort you to Cardassia" to read "We were sent to escort you to Cardassia".
-Consider setting up Captain Hernandez dialogue to change based on the players choice to detonate the charges or not. I did not but Hernandez asked about an explosion.

Captain's ready room#2: This is a good map design with excellent story dialogue and is a good wrap up to the mission. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.

---------End Report----------

Thanks again for authoring and for giving me the chance to review your work. You did a great job developing this mission and I look forward to playing/reviewing more of your work in the future.
Brian

This critique report also filed 01/20/2014 on forum posting for: Now available! "The Bajoran"
If you would like a detailed review of your mission please visit my forum posting "In depth mission reports upon request" for details. Also see Evil 70th's list of missions at "Evil 70th's Missions".
Career Officer
Join Date: Aug 2012
Posts: 845
# 879
01-20-2014, 04:08 PM
Mission: Extraction
Faction: Fed
Author: nak3dsnake
ID: ST-HRJS4PZ5N

This is my "first" official Foundry mission. I have made 3, one that's WIP, and one I deleted entirely because of quality. This mission is a testbed for techniques in use for my second foundry mission, The Gauntlet Awaits. This was my first attempt at writing dialogue for characters and the warp sequence, and I thought it was good overall. It has combat, mild combat however until the finale. It's not too tough, I mostly focused on the mechanics of the mission more than story or combat, but later on revised the story and dialogs to make it flow nicely.

Also maybe known as "SFC3"
Career Officer
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 971
# 880
01-21-2014, 01:40 PM
"[Rom] Valley of the Shadow II" (aka "The Shadow of Death")
Mission ID: ST-HLAM39YR6
Author: @NCC-89471
Faction: Federation-allied Romulan
Level restriction: 31+
Duration: 60 minutes (estimated minimum)
Combat: Ground and Space
Summary: Having found evidence of a devastating new Tal Shiar terror weapon, can you uncover the truth behind it before entire worlds - and even New Romulus itself - fall into its shadow?
Where to post review: In this thread, and this one.


Mission notes:
  • This series is a prequel to my Fed series Ghosts of War. (It is not necessary to play that series first, but Part II's plot does foreshadow it in certain places.)
  • This series takes place between Cryptic series "Vengeance" and "Freedom" in the Romulan Republic story arc.
  • Story-driven with heavy dialogue.
  • Designed to be played using a ship with a cloaking device. (Note: Player ship will sometimes decloak on dialogs and certain objectives, but not close enough for enemies to notice.)
  • Maps 6-8 made with substitute maps; will be rebuilt once their intended locales (New Romulus space and Command Center) become available to Foundry authors.
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 09:20 AM.