1. When do i get to pick my ship i have the starter ship but want a diffrent one ?
Upon promotion to Lieutenant Commander (you need to spend 6700 skill points in total to get there).
2. can i craft wep armor and such?
You can upgrade items into better versions via Memory Alpha and anomaly data.
3. as for skill points it seems like i spend all my points in the frist Part should i keep them for when i lvl up to use the second row?
You can't save skill points for the next rank, as promotions are based on skill points spent, not skill points earned.
3b can i respect my toons skill points and Officer points?
Respecs for your captain's skills are apparently on the way fairly soon. You can't respec bridge officers, but you can train them in different abilities or replace them with different officers - there's no cap on bridge officer skill points.