Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 21
05-24-2011, 03:14 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by mygod_itsfullofstars

Kali-fal

I liked the alternate beginning story--not back to Vega. I also liked the way you set the context. Just a quick grammatical note: it should be "ground" not "grinded." Lastly, you might change the way you refer to the Andorian. I know this is soft canon, but I've occassionally heard that Andorians have 4 genders. If you added some reference to that, it might up the Trekiness of your story.
Nice catch! I have to admit I did my story when I was really, really tired. And I'm really bad about proofreading my own writing.

And yeah, I did consider adding in the 'proper' (albeit soft canon) gender name for the andorian, but I wanted to make it understandable to the average reader who may not know the various genders of the andorian people, and might have been confused. Although if I do something similar in the future, I might phrase it a bit better to include both the Trek term and equate it with a real world term.
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 22
05-24-2011, 01:14 PM
Edits done on Luna. I've edited it for some clarity regarding the position of the main character in the flashback sequence and have split up a few of the paragraphs to make it more web-friendly.
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 23
05-24-2011, 02:14 PM
*hands out mugs of hot cocoa to all readers and writers*
It really is awesome to see how constructive everyone treats one another. An absolute joy; both reading your stories and seeing how you help one another making them better.

I'm still hunting for the next spotlight mission; once that's in the bag I'll read the latest entries here and work on my own story to add.
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 24
05-24-2011, 03:10 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by WishStone
*hands out mugs of hot cocoa to all readers and writers*
It really is awesome to see how constructive everyone treats one another. An absolute joy; both reading your stories and seeing how you help one another making them better.
Aye, a stroke of genius this lit challenge.

while i posses no artistic skills myself, perhaps a drawing contest as well? or maybe something involving Photoshop? for our many talented designers, like a design the cover your star trek novel/literary peice, or just a general star trek poster.

Quote:
I'm still hunting for the next spotlight mission; once that's in the bag I'll read the latest entries here and work on my own story to add.
Spirits of ramok nor - for the feds
fire and steel - for the klinks

/end search

ps. id recommaned any of mine but i already had a spotlight one, so i dont want to steal the limelight too
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 25
05-24-2011, 03:12 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Captain_Revo
Aye, a stroke of genius this lit challenge.

while i posses no artistic skills myself, perhaps a drawing contest as well? or maybe something involving Photoshop?

D
Who is to say one cannot tell a story through a photo? A picture speaks a thousand words. If that is where your talent lies why not put together a photo and post it up?
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 26
05-24-2011, 03:31 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Captain_Revo
...

while i posses no artistic skills myself, perhaps a drawing contest as well? or maybe something involving Photoshop? for our many talented designers, like a design the cover your star trek novel/literary peice, or just a general star trek poster...
I'm the same way in regards to art but I know there are many talented artists out there. A visual thread (if pikchars will be allowed) would be great. Here's some other ideas:
  • A link on the launcher.
  • Some kind of highlighting on the main page, like the news gallery.
  • A biweekly/monthly promotion of the best from each thread on the news gallery/launcher
A lot of MMOs, certainly those I've seen with development houses east of Greenwich tend to have these humongous community portals where players can interact with each other. I'm not saying anything like that, but they promote their community on the front page; I personally feel that is important. I hate to make the comparison but TOR's regular community spotlight does have its merits.

I respect you are but one person WishStone so don't over do it. This so far has been awesome and I know people are reading if not posting. Let's get more doing the same!
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 27
05-24-2011, 03:32 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Inquizitor View Post
Who is to say one cannot tell a story through a photo? A picture speaks a thousand words. If that is where your talent lies why not put together a photo and post it up?
^- I'd go for that, too, and index it. ^^
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 28
05-24-2011, 03:46 PM
Ok I posted my story and I *might* have had too many hits with the Aperture Science Inspiration Pillow because I had to split my story into two parts. (I KNOW!! Now maybe people will be intimidated by its length and not read it :O :O) I could have cut a few scenes but, I really wanted to tell the whole story ... hope you guys aren't getting tired with my main character (always the same captain).

Any and all feedback (even about its lenght) is welcome. I'll try and post something (not now, I'm bloody tired) about some of the other stories. I do read them (and love them), but I can be too analytical and I end up writing several forum pages filled with comments. I think I'm going to save you all that =) (unless you guys don't mind??).

Now I'm off to bed and Wishy ... you're a freakin' genius for inventing this. =)

(oh right, my story is named: "First Impressions", btw)
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 29
05-24-2011, 08:30 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by WishStone
^- I'd go for that, too, and index it. ^^
I'd love to see how something like that would work out. In game screenshots or otherwise. Not exactly my forte, but still, I think it would be fantastic to let the more photogenic batch of us get some work in.

Also, I'd just like to add this to my fellow writers-
I've read almost all of the stories so far, and I'm loving them all, guys. Leave it to the Star Trek community to write the best fanfics in the world.
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 30
05-25-2011, 01:05 AM
Finally got around to posting my submission.
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