Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 1 The Search for Niemy
12-19-2011, 09:27 PM
Hello all, I posted a new Federation mission entitled "The Search for Niemy".

Name: The Search for Niemy
Federation mission
Min Level: 16+ (LC 5)
ST-HN2V3LFZQ

It's a loose follow up to my "Good Intentions" missions, where a character of the same name is killed in a mission involving your crew. It also works as a standalone mission if you can accept that little bit of predetermined history. =)

Feel free to give it a go - I've done a few creative things here such as making my first custom interior, and a space map with branching choice objectives, that I hope works well. Please reply with any feedback you might have on it here, I'm definitely open to it.

Thank you and happy Foundrying!
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 2
12-23-2011, 04:22 AM
Played all three back to back yesterday, great set of missions from both a story and technical standpoint.

I really enjoyed the opening sequence to this one, something I haven't seen done before but very effective (and powerful if the previous mission has been played).
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 3
12-23-2011, 06:25 PM
TYVM Stylsy! I'm glad you liked it.

Unfortunately the mission is getting hit by strange technical issues involving objects triggering at random/incorrect times, which isnt something I have control over unfortunately. If it happens to anyone here, please let me know what happens so I can keep a record. Doesn't happen most of the time though, so thanks for the ratings so far!
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
Quote:
Originally Posted by RogueEnterprise View Post
Hey Brian, hoping you could take a look at my latest, a loose follow up to the Good Intentions series you looked at a while back.

Name: The Search for Niemy
Federation mission
Min Level: 16+ (LC 5)
ST-HN2V3LFZQ
Est. Mission length: 30-40 minutes
Delivery method: Forum post

Any detailed feedback you can provide would be great. Note that I've been encountering some very strange issues where objects will trigger at wildly incorrect times on the first map and the "Rescue Operation" map, but seem to be correct if you re-zone. I implore you to push on if you encounter them so you can see the whole mission, but let me know when/where it happens so I can keep track of that.

Thanks in advance!
Federation Mission - The Search for Niemy
Author: RogueEnterprise
Allegiance: Federation
Project ID: ST-HN2V3LFZQ

----------Report Start-----------

Summary: This is an outstanding mission from start to finish. The map design and use of effects to limit the number of map changes and still maintain the story integrity is excellent. The use of the warping effects is outstanding. Im using this effect in a mission I am currently working on as well. I would highly recommend this mission to anyone who likes a good story, great maps and good optional battles.

Since the court martial is the first map you should consider changing the start location of the first custom map to one of the doors on ESD or K-7. It just felt a little awkward going all the way to the Donatu System to start that first map which ends with your science officer mentioning you have a patrol to get to. I think it would flow a little better starting that way.

Below are some things I noted while playing the mission that I wanted to let you know about. Everything in this write up should be seen as suggestions on ways I felt you could improve certain elements of the mission. They are yours to do with as you see fit.

Mission Description: This is an excellent description that draws me in and makes me want to click the "Hail" button. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this description.

Grant Mission Dialog: This is a good simple dialog to follow up the description. It's just vague enough to draw in the player in and make them want to click the "Accept" button. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialog.

Mission Task: This is a good simple task which clearly indicates the location of the first custom map. I noted no spelling errors with this task.

Mission Entry Prompt: This is a good use of the prompt. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialog.

MAPS:
Bridge: The map design is outstanding and the dialog is very well done. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialog or any issues with the map. I noted a couple of items to consider changing:
-The post "Signal the crew" dialog; consider changing the "Alert" dialog to [OOC] vice [MissionInfo] dialog to help it stand out.
-I had all my officers in the turbolift and as soon as I exited they all try to follow me and disappeared. Also some of the Klingons on the shuttle deck seem to disappear as I started to engage them by myself. That might be the program adjusting the fight based on the fact that none of my BOFFs were with me.
-The Admiral is pointing at a wall and the Commander is not visible anywhere in the room. The wall the Admiral is pointing at has a chair on it. Is this where the commander is supposed to be sitting?

Patrol: This is an excellent map design. Your use of the warp streak effects to allow you to utilize the same map is outstanding. The story dialog is great. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialog or any issues with the map. I noted only one item to consider changing:
-The "Map Transfer" dialog; consider changing "Away team should report to Transporter Room 2, sir" to read "Away team assembled, sir". Then change the response button "Assemble away team" to read "Energize".

Asteroid Surface: The map design is outstanding and I really like the asteroids and stars overhead. That is a nice touch. The optional battles are excellent. The story dialog is very well done. I noted no spelling errors with this dialog or any issues with the map. I noted one item to consider changing:
-Consider changing the [OOC] dialog "He moves hesitantly come with you towards the beam out point" to read "He moves hesitantly to come with you towards the beam out point".

Ready Room: This is a nice simple map design with excellent effects and interactions. The story dialog is outstanding. I noted no issues with the map. I noted a couple of items to consider changing:
-In "Admiral Burwl" dialog from the "Patrol" map the Admiral refers to "Starbase K-9". In the dialog with "Commander Ozten" he makes reference to "Derilection of duty aboard Starbase K-7".
-In that same dialog consider changing "Derilection of duty" to read "Dereliction of duty".
-The "I hope you have proof" dialog; consider changing "NIemy is being held" to read "Niemy is being held". This error is repeated in the response to the button "I'm not sure about that".
-The "Holorecording" dialog; consider changing "Other off-screen laugher is also heard" to read "Other off-screen laughter is also heard".
-The "I don't think he's trustworthy" dialog; consider changing "With that crowing list of" to read "With that growing list of".

Rescue Operation: This map design is excellent and the effects are very well done. The story dialog is well written. I noted a couple of items to consider changing:
-The initial dialog; consider changing "the intelligence reports that Captain Niemy" to read "the intelligence reports indicate that Captain Niemy".
-The "We could try that" dialog; consider changing "if that's a prodent course of action" to read "if that's a prudent course of action".
-The "Hold on" dialog; there is a hard return in the dialog between "I" and "agree".
-The second "Warp effect" after the Niemy extraction doesn't work well. If possible set the map up to use the the first warp effect that you used for the East to West map transit.
-I managed to get in and extract Niemy without engaging the Klingon warships around the transport. When I finally go to warp they are still visable during warp and once I secure from warp. Realizing you can't make them invisible you may be able to avoid this by moving the "Drop from warp" point further away.

Starbase Sickbay: This map is well done and the story dialog is a great wrap up map for the mission. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialog or any issues with the map.

---------End Report----------

Thanks again for authoring and for giving me the chance to review your work. Your work on this mission is outstanding and I thoroughly enjoyed every minute of it.
Brian

This critique report also filed 12/26/2011 on forum posting for: In depth mission reports upon request.
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 5
12-28-2011, 05:32 AM
I loved this mission. Its so clever and really well put together.

I had some slight issues with the enemy npc on the first interiors map. the map is so complex that the npc's have a tendency to get caught on different levels. not the authors fault at all, just an issue with the foundry but it was a minor issue as you dont have to defeat them to continue.
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 6
02-10-2012, 07:28 PM
Circling back to Revo's response here for the pathing... Ive seen that pop up in reviews for this mission and been dinged on it. Unfortunately I have no idea why it happens! One of those weird pathing things I guess.
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