I'll be honest, I don't want to abandon my own fleet if I merge with another. Especially since I've personally put a lot of resources into my starbase already (like the 200K dilithium windows).
So seanaldusmagnus, I appreciate the offer (I think you were offering to absorb us), but I must decline at this time.
Since you were asking for ideas to help get people to merge that are concerned about losing their fleet identity, here are some things that I think gaining fleets should offer or at least discuss with merging fleets:
1. Offer the Merging Fleets' officers a place in your fleet. Even if you don't want to share power, at least allow them to be officers in your fleet. By doing this the new fleet won't be dominated by the original, gaining fleet. Think of the Marquis in Voyager.
2. Discuss the possibility of renaming the new merged fleet and creating a new logo. Larger, well known fleets might not want to do this, but smaller fleets like mine should definitely consider and discuss this.