Firstly, I am new to STO, but I have played a very many MMO in my days starting with EverQuest in 1999.
Secondly, I understand I'm a free player and have no reason or right to demand any changes in the game, so please take this as a recommendation and simply -- my two cents.
One thing I've noticed that really helps any mmo combat player in any game I've played is color coordinating the backgrounds of the tiles by adding a slight color overlay to the background of the button.
For instance, abilities that are targeted to allies and yourself can have green backgrounds, abilities that target your group can be blue, fleet targeting abilities can be purple, enemy (single target) can be red, enemy aoe targeting can be orange, self-destruct "buffs" like ramming speed and abandon ship could be yellow. This would help players distinguish easier between abandon ship and fleet support which in the heat of battle can look very similar.
Anyways, hope that helps in some way and hopefully I'll get to see my idea in the game