Join Date: Jul 2012
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# 101
01-21-2013, 06:01 PM
Originally Posted by squatsauce View Post
It's a short homage to HP Lovecraft's own Commonplace Book.
Is that different from the Necronomicon?

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Delta Rising: Reanimate? (Y/N) Review Series COMPLETE!
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Posts: 3,757
# 102
01-21-2013, 06:41 PM
Originally Posted by squatsauce View Post
a grim tome penned in ancient times by a mad Romulan.
Now that's an LC in its own right

Originally Posted by gulberat View Post
And I see no less than 4 possible references to the Cthulhu Mythos in there. O_o

I got Alyosha's Devidian form drawn. It's mostly based on the Visitor "template," though I mixed in a few Eidolon features for the sake of individual variation.

I kind of messed up in positioning the drawing on the paper as I started. I would've been fine if drawing a human-proportioned character, but should've moved up further to accommodate the elongated Devidian proportions. Then again, at least that spared me from having to do a lot of detail in drawing feet, which I am awful at.

That said...I'm not going with the rather ridiculous heights seen in the actual game for Devidians, unless it is possibly explained as a matter of shapeshifting. So I would put Alyosha's true height at 6'3" at the most. (In human form, he is a shorter and stockier 5'9".)

Human form:
Devidian form:

In this's definitely a mistake to judge a book by its cover.

(Further irony: to the Devidians he is incredibly unnerving because even in his natural form his mannerisms read as "human" and completely off-kilter by their standards.)
Survivor of Remus
Join Date: Dec 2012
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# 103
01-21-2013, 06:52 PM
Originally Posted by gulberat View Post
Is that different from the Necronomicon?
Yup. It was a book where he jotted down ideas for stories that occurred to him. You can see a transcription of it here:
Lt. Commander
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Join Date: Jul 2012
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# 105
01-22-2013, 01:17 AM
Very nice...I liked all of the different personalities on display there. I could imagine what each of those people must've been like when they were alive (assuming they were from prior time periods).

I'm curious...was the Klingon a TOS Klingon? For some reason that's what I pictured.

I'm not quite sure I got what was going on with the metreon gas jar, though, or why someone was (presumably) firing their tetryon weapon in your captain's ready room, though.

The only thing you might want to address from a formatting standpoint is that whenever you copied this from your word processor, the punctuation didn't translate properly onto the forum. But the actual content of your work was good, beyond the one confusing area.

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Delta Rising: Reanimate? (Y/N) Review Series COMPLETE!
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# 106
01-22-2013, 06:40 AM
Originally Posted by zidanetribal View Post
Awesome entry, I really enjoyed it
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# 107
01-22-2013, 05:42 PM
Incredible! 11 pages of discussion That's awesome! Thanks for everyone's feedback -- this is what I love seeing.

I am going to unstick this as I prepare to post #37, but, as always, feel free to continue discussing.


Brandon =/\=
Brandon "BranFlakes" Felczer | Former Community Team Lead for Perfect World Entertainment
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 38
# 108
01-22-2013, 06:04 PM
ok, so I didn't get to work more on Haunted before the time ran out, but I have an idea to alleviate it and I would like to guage some community interest.

What would you guys say to me taking the stories I've made for each Lit Challenge I've done, editing and/or finishing them as necessary, and then posting them on Deviantart for all to see? I would link you to the page,when this is done obviously, but I'd like to know if theres any interest in that kind of stuff first.

If your interested, do let me know, the more feedback I get, the quicker I'll be able to motivate myself to do it.
Krovennan Darksabre: Commanding officer of the U.S.S. Blacksabre-E NX-973484-E

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Join Date: Sep 2012
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# 109
01-23-2013, 08:49 AM
@gulberat - Thank you for the feedback! With Captain's Logs I try to imagine the character 'talking" to the computer (or rather to the audience) like the TV Captains did - official, to-the-point and factual. Yet, their personality should also show in some way. I really appreciate your thoughts on my writing style

I couldn't go supernatural on this because others here had done it so well! But I also didn't want to stretch into "God-Mod" mode. I am not sure if the suit will be seen in future posts for that reason, so I figured ... "well, why not have it exist anyway?"

@mrdarksabre - Doooo eeet!
Kathryn S. Beringer - The Dawn Patrol

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Posts: 488
# 110
01-23-2013, 11:07 AM
zidanetribal, that's a great entry - slightly derivative of a certain other encounter with a late-20th probe, but hey, Trek reuses plots all the time. (Heck, much of TMP was just a remake of TOS "The Changeling" with a feature film budget.) I didn't manage to figure the twist out for myself before the reveal, but I really enjoyed going back afterward and reading the reactions of the various characters with context.

gulberat: I figured that was Klaang, the glory-hungry young Klingon captain from that-movie-we-don't-talk-about-that-would-otherwise-be-#5. Looks like he didn't destroy P10 after all... And while it's a bit slapstick, I assumed that yes, the admiral was idly shooting at his wall trophy, just 'cause. It helps to set up his later Kirk-style behavior.

With regards to your own story - as Vulcans are fond of saying, "Fascinating." A novel character who draws on a fine tradition of unique foundlings (including Data himself, until other Soong androids started popping up). And I like the detail that to Devidians, he would fall into what we call the uncanny valley...
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