Captain
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 3,271
# 41
01-24-2013, 01:34 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by hfmudd View Post
If you'll forgive the pedantry: it's shuttles that are named for scientists. Runabouts are named for rivers; all the ones in canon are for rivers on Earth, but by 2409 you could probably make the excuse that they've run out / moved on to other founding worlds, if you want something more exotic.


I can use the criteria of Kane's shuttles being named after solar events. First was the Equinox, and the second was the Zenith, but in truth, the Equinox was named for the Nova-Class ship
Captain
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 3,271
# 42
01-24-2013, 01:47 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by hfmudd View Post
I confess, I'm intimidated; even if I had a solid idea for any of my captains, I don't think I'd dare after reading these.
Do it I very nearly passed up on this challenge, thinking "People don't know my characters anyway, an alternate wouldn't really be much of a contrast..." and was just going to draw Courtney Cox in an MU uniform But in the end, I knew that to benefit from the LCs, I have to play whatever hand it deals me, so I just let the ideas percolate
Captain
Join Date: Sep 2012
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# 43
01-24-2013, 02:27 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by hfmudd View Post
I confess, I'm intimidated; even if I had a solid idea for any of my captains, I don't think I'd dare after reading these.
Dooo eeet There is no right or wrong and if you are willing to receive feedback, then whatever you create will be worth reading
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Captain
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 579
# 44
01-24-2013, 04:24 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by hfmudd View Post
I confess, I'm intimidated; even if I had a solid idea for any of my captains, I don't think I'd dare after reading these.
May I add a "do it" to the chorus? Writing's fun. And it improves with practice, like everything else. (I'm enjoying these challenges a lot - and I'm glad, as always, if people are enjoying the results!)
Rihannsu
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 216
# 45
01-24-2013, 04:58 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by hfmudd View Post
I confess, I'm intimidated; even if I had a solid idea for any of my captains, I don't think I'd dare after reading these.

(...snip)
You should write an entry! No matter how it turns out (I switched between first- and third-person SEVERAL times in mine ), we'll all enjoy reading it.

Side note: Edited mine to fix the switching between 1st and 3rd person (Leyla, if you're reading this, thanks for pointing that out.)

Shevet: Great entry! Sounds like Tylha has a lot of personal reflection coming up.

@marcus:

As an aside, you're welcome to use my soundtrack idea if you wish.
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Captain
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 3,271
# 46
01-24-2013, 05:46 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by ironphoenix113 View Post
@marcus:

As an aside, you're welcome to use my soundtrack idea if you wish.

Although it's not quite long enough, starting In the House in a Heartbeat by John Murphy when Kane and Palmer are first called to the bridge gives a fairly appropriate soundtrack till the point where he meets his counterpart Any other feedback you may have on the entry would be much appreciated Did it work, or did it just drag?
Captain
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 1,094
# 47
01-24-2013, 06:23 PM
Man...Shevet, that was a truly awesome story!!! I loved your thoughts on the more "philosophical" side of things--yet never did I feel the action was slowing down.

I also thought that was really brave of you to have Tylha reveal such an ugly moment, and to a subordinate, at that. I hope they'll be able to have the same--or maybe an improved--working relationship after that. Maybe having to vocalize those attitudes will bring about an improvement. After all, Soledad is going to be watching, and watching closely.



Unfortunately I'm even more sure I won't be entering this week's challenge. Contemplating Mirror!Alyosha is just horrible, on so many levels. He's either a tool of Mirror Starfleet Command's--a horrible thing to unleash upon enemies, an assassin or torturer--or he's with the Devidians, in just as terrible of a state. And after what Alyosha went through in the last entry...I'm neither willing to put him through that nor do I feel up to writing it.
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Lt. Commander
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 146
# 48
01-24-2013, 06:27 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by bortjinx View Post
It's not very well written, since I've just knocked it up in half an hour over my lunch break.
I also liked your idea of mirror Trill society. My main recommendation is something you have probably already thought of - make the formatting consistent.

I find myself coming up with ideas while commuting. Perhaps the frustration with other drivers is taken out on my fictional crew later on?
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 146
# 49
01-24-2013, 06:38 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by hfmudd View Post
Some really excellent stories in this batch, including (of course) another great work by shevet. I confess, I'm intimidated; even if I had a solid idea for any of my captains, I don't think I'd dare after reading these.
Well by now hopefully you have fallen for the peer pressure and started writing. Anyone who can point out the subtle difference between shuttle and runabout nomenclature should be able to write a decent short story. (Now I have to figure out why Captain Carter bucks the system - that should be easy. Rivers are boring!)

Thanks to the others who made suggestions. Now I'm certain that the third runabout can't be named after a human. Maybe it'll be named after the Andorian who invented chroniton mines...or the Vulcan who created an injection to help fellow Vulcans withstand the hideous smell of humans.
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 146
# 50
01-24-2013, 06:48 PM
destroyer831642 - welcome to the mayhem of literary challenges (and hopefully you are reading these - I haven't seen you post to this thread. Please do so!).

I liked how the mirror universe characters "won." It's too easy to make the normal universe characters the good guys and the mirror universe characters the bad guys.

One suggestion - add some more descriptive sentences next time. You have a lot of dialogue but not a lot of showing us what happened. Was the mirror ship of the same design? What went through your captain's mind as his/her ship was obliterated? (And is your captain male or female? I missed that.) Details like those would make it more well-rounded.

(And feel free to comment/critique my entry too. That's part of the fun.)
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