Action is a problem for me as i tend to be very detailed with my descriptions of what the character is doing (I think) but moving scenes can get bogged in the details. If the scene came across in your mind's eye well then I may be getting a little better at it.
But really, gulberat's advice for space combat is sitting with me and I gave it a small shot (no pun intended) in this piece. Obviously I left out the beginning and middle of the fight between ships because ... well ... that wasn't the point to the story. So I decided to describe the end Again, if the scene works, then the advice I was given may be working
On the steath suit - I'm a little loathe to the idea that I'm trying to force my schtick's into the overall lore of Star Trek. So I'm thinking this will be the last time it gets used - it served a purpose to get the action done, but I can't have this one-of-a-kind item become a gimmick for the future. I think it's comfortable to say that any research on personal cloak technology could be done on a lone station like Regula-1, without making a big deal in the grand scheme of things ... especially if it stays in R&D for the duration of a fictional universe
You're very welcome, the scenes flowed absolutely fine This was my first space battle in a decade As for the stealth suit, it didn't come across as forced personal schtick, as the already exists within the Trekverse, so no need to worry on that score Personally, I'm all for forcing schtick, but I try and keep it as in universe as possible to minimize any jarring (not sure how successful I am with that )
Usually once the idea has occurred to me, I can knock a story right out, and wait impatiently for the next LC - but this time I'm glad it's staying up for so long. This week has been spring break, so I've been dealing with two kids, one of whom is a seven-year-old with ADD and a Cars video game on the Wii. Not exactly conducive to getting a lot of writing done...
Thankfully, that all clears up come Monday, so I may have a bit more time available. I'm working on another tale of Grunt and the USS Bastogne - the time isn't yet ripe for my crew to abandon the Bastogne for the heavy cruiser Hadrian, as they already have in game.
[quote=marcusdkane;9061931]@ asardetemplari: I actually didn't mind the idea of the Vulcans creating bio-weapons... I really like the idea of the un-named captain, and rather like the cut of their jib, it'll be interesting to see how future LCs expand on their character Also, having a rather warped sense of humor, I did chuckle at the MACO hanging themself in sickbay... QUOTE]
I could continue it... tbh, I wrote that when I was half-asleep. so I decided to let whatever was in my head out on the paper.