Starfleet Veteran
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 786
# 631
04-27-2013, 12:06 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by cougarxls View Post
evil70th, I am looking for reviews too; I'd love to hear what you think of my mission.

Thanks!

Name: Cero Troubles
ID: ST-HQJQM996X
Author: CougarXLS
Faction: Starfleet
Level: 16+
Duration: 40+ mins (about 30 mins if you skip the dialogue)

On a world where peoples of many different species peacefully co-exist, tragedy has struck. A plague is threatening almost all life on the planet. While some believe that this plague is naturally occurring, there have been reports that the virus was artificially generated.
This world has rejected advanced technology on the surface, in favour of a simple way of life. They do not have the medical abilities and technologies to combat this plague.
An investigation into this plague will leading to a shocking discovery that threatens the whole sector, and may have serious consequences for Starfleet.

-CougarXLS
Hi CougarXLS,

Thanks for submitting your mission for review. You are currently 13th in the queue behind chitowngrizz420. I will get to the mission as soon as I can will and post the review here upon completion.

Thanks for authoring,
Brian
If you would like a detailed review of your mission please visit my forum posting "In depth mission reports upon request" for details. Also see Evil 70th's list of missions at "Evil 70th's Missions".
Starfleet Veteran
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 786
# 632
04-27-2013, 12:10 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by horriblecat View Post
Hello,

Thought I would put in my mission here for you to review.

Name: All Roads Lead To Rome
ID: ST-HRPGRETGV
Author: horriblecat
Faction: Starfleet
Level: 31+
Duration: Roughly about 20 to 25 minutes

This is my first attempt at the foundry so I am hoping I did well. I added a lot of personal feel to he storyline with main and side characters I created that represent crew on "your" ship. The story is one that I actually have a great conclusion for. This one is interesting to say the least and it was difficult to put what was in my head into the limited foundry resources. Let me know what you think of it.

I still may do a revision of it later on after finals are done with and I have more free time to develop a more concrete story.
Hi horriblecat,

Welcome to the queue. Your mission is currently 14th in the queue behind CougarXLS. I will post the review here upon completion.

Thanks for authoring,
Brian
If you would like a detailed review of your mission please visit my forum posting "In depth mission reports upon request" for details. Also see Evil 70th's list of missions at "Evil 70th's Missions".
Starfleet Veteran
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 786
# 633
04-27-2013, 12:15 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by antman9173 View Post
I have a mission I'd like you to review.

Admiral in Peril v1
@antman9173
Fed 41+
run time: (1 captain) between 15~25 minutes (team) longer (haven't tested)

The mission actually starts out at ESD console outside transporter despite the mission text as I'm still testing and fine tuning, but i wanted a good critic before i tweak anymore as the mission is pretty much done. Your reviews are very well structured and I enjoy the refreshing positive and constructive critiquing.
Hi antman9173,

Welcome to the queue. You are currently 15th in the queue behind horriblecat. I will post the review here once it is completed.

Thanks for authoring,
Brian
If you would like a detailed review of your mission please visit my forum posting "In depth mission reports upon request" for details. Also see Evil 70th's list of missions at "Evil 70th's Missions".
Starfleet Veteran
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 786
Quote:
Originally Posted by diogene0 View Post
Hey. I'm glad to see you're still enjoying reviewing missions. Hope you're doing well. I have a little review request for you.

Mission Name: Demons from the past
Author: @diogene0
Minimum Level: 16+
Allegiance: Federation
Estimated Mission Length: under 45 minutes, unless you're using a cruiser. In this case you may add 10 minutes.

I hope I missed less typos this time, i've been slaving over my dictionary and grammar book for hours!

Thanks for your review.
Federation Mission - Demons from the past
Author: diogene0
Allegiance: Federation
Project ID: ST-HO8FMV3YH

----------Report Start-----------

Summary: This is a good mission with great map designs, several tough battles, and well written story dialogue. I would highly recommend this mission to all players but not on Elite level. I definitely enjoyed playing the mission.

Below are some things I noted while playing the mission that I wanted to let you know about. Everything in this write up should be seen as suggestions on ways I felt you could improve certain elements of the mission. They are yours to do with as you see fit.

Mission Description: This is a very detailed description with intriguing story description. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this

Grant Mission Dialogue: The grant and follow on dialogue is well written. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue.

Mission Task: This is a good initial mission task. I noted no spelling errors with this task.

Mission Entry Prompt: This is a good use of the prompt. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this prompt.

MAPS:
Reception hall: This is a good map design with well written story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I note one item to consider changing;
-This is a minor issue and one of choice. Consider changing the optional dialogue to triggered dialogue that goes away after the player interacts.

Mol'Rihan VI: This is a good map design with several tough battles and well written story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I note one item to consider changing;
-The battle is already engaged when the player enters. This leaves little or no time to read. Consider triggering the combat to start with a trigger post initial dialogue.

Internment Camp: This is a good map design with several tough battles and well written story dialogue. I noted a couple of items to consider changing:
-At the initial spawn point some of the away team is stuck in the ground.
-Consider adding respawn points closer to the building.

Mol'Rihan space: This is a good map design with some tough but fun battles and well written story dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I note one item to consider changing;
-The choices at the end are good; however you need to set up the triggers to make the other choice disappear depending on the player selecting the opposite choice.

---------End Report----------

Thanks again for authoring and for giving me the chance to review your work. You did a good job developing this mission and I look forward to playing/reviewing more of your work in the future.
Brian
If you would like a detailed review of your mission please visit my forum posting "In depth mission reports upon request" for details. Also see Evil 70th's list of missions at "Evil 70th's Missions".
Starfleet Veteran
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 786
Quote:
Originally Posted by maziken View Post
I would love a review of my latest mission!

ID: ST-HQ7JQ5IID
Title: Never Count a Gorn Out
Author: @Maziken
Faction: KDF
Playtime: 40 to 60 minutes
Difficulty: Tough
Description: A secret Federation starbase has been revealed and you are ordered to infiltrate it to gather as much data as you can. Will you sneak your way through the installation, only alerting those Starfleet Officers that you must, or will you eradicate every last one of them from the starbase?

Thanks in advance!
Klingon Mission - Never Count a Gorn Out
Author: Maziken
Allegiance: Klingon
Project ID: ST-HQ7JQ5IID

----------Report Start-----------

Summary: This is a good mission with excellent map designs, several tough, but glorious battles, and great story dialogue. There were a few issues with the layout of the optional dialogue triggers on the "Federation Starbase" map discussed below. The fact that you used trigger able dialogue as a means to move the mission forward is great but the execution of them needs some work. Despite that I thoroughly enjoyed the mission and would highly recommend the mission to other players.

Below are a couple of things I noted while playing the mission that I wanted to let you know about. Everything in this write up should be seen as suggestions on ways I felt you could improve certain elements of the mission. They are yours to do with as you see fit.

Mission Description: This is a good detailed description. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this description.

Grant Mission Dialogue: This is good grant dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue.

Mission Task: Consider adding the start location for the first custom map. I noted no spelling errors with this task.

Mission Entry Prompt: This is a good use of the prompt. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this prompt.

MAPS:
Donatu System, Eta Eridani Sector: This is a good map design with several tough but glorious battles. The story dialogue is well written. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I noted one item to consider changing:
-You need to add a respawn point closer to the broken planet or scale back the number of enemy mobs.

Federation Starbase: This is a good map design with several tough but glorious battles. The story dialogue is well written and I liked the use of optional dialogue, however you need to consider reworking the way they are deployed. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I noted one item to consider changing:
-The setup of the Gorn life signs being detected in the south corridor needs better setup. If the player goes down and rescues the Gorn nothing happens until much later, so it seems to be pointless until later. You should set up the triggers so if the enemy mob guarding the Gorn is killed the Gorn starts talking. As it is now that does not trigger until after the player goes to the door to exit. Having the player run back and forth on the map is pointless and annoying.

Donatu System: This is a good map design with several tough but glorious battles. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue. I noted no spelling or grammatical errors with this dialogue or any issues with the map.

---------End Report----------

Thanks again for authoring and for giving me the chance to review your work. You did a good job developing this mission. I look forward to playing/reviewing more of your work in the future.
Brian

This critique report also filed 05/05/2013 on forum posting for: Never Count a Gorn Out
If you would like a detailed review of your mission please visit my forum posting "In depth mission reports upon request" for details. Also see Evil 70th's list of missions at "Evil 70th's Missions".
Career Officer
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 3
# 636
05-05-2013, 04:14 PM
Mission Name: Task Force Sol
Author: usmcprim
Minimum Level: 41+
Allegiance: FED
Estimated Mission Length: 45 min - 1 1/2 hrs

Captain
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 1,760
# 637
05-05-2013, 10:52 PM



Hello Evil. I love your in depth reviews. Just published my first mission: A time to search by @lincolninspace. It is still under review and needs played aa few times. Thanks in advance
Play more STO Foundry! (You can thank me later.)

A TIME TO SEARCH: ENTER MY FOUNDRY MISSION at the RISA SYSTEM in the SIRIUS SECTOR
Career Officer
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 10
# 638
05-10-2013, 02:11 AM
I love checking this thread for some great missions.
Its been awhile since I've been able to put a mission out. Hopefully I'll have more time in the coming months to play around in the foundry some more. I was able to slowly put together this one though.

Mission Name: Eternal Madness
Author: dewey001
Minimum Level: 31+
Allegiance: Starfleet
Project ID: ST-HQQZ4SOU7
Estimated Mission Length: 1hr15min


A troublesome mystery leads your crew to a devious plot hatched by a long lost Starfleet crew who are consumed by a madness that knows no bounds. You must take your ship and crew on a journey where logic need not endeavor and where heroes fear to tread. Can you and your crew solve the riddle in time to save everyone?
Report to the Lirss System in the Iota Pavonis Sector Block and delve into the mayhem and persevere the treachery.


Reading is required
Multiple dialog options with multiple outcomes
TAC/SCI/ENG skills used to resolve puzzles/battles
-Treknobabble
-Historical/scientific/engineering research
-Trek canon/lore
-Numerous details related to Star Trek's shows, toys, movies, and STO
--All used to bring you a fully immersive mission.(Feel free to alt+tab and look up any info you find)

P.S
Seriously, alt+tab at stuff you find (if you're an info junkie like me). It was mostly coincidence, but the fact that things came together so well blew my mind.

Last edited by captdewey; 05-10-2013 at 02:18 AM.
Starfleet Veteran
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 786
# 639
05-10-2013, 07:29 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by evildeadxl View Post
Mission Name: Task Force Sol
Author: usmcprim
Minimum Level: 41+
Allegiance: FED
Estimated Mission Length: 45 min - 1 1/2 hrs
Hi evildeadx1,

I assume you are submitting this mission on behalf of the author? Or is the difference in the author name and your name because of the switch to PerfectWorld? Thanks for the review request. This mission is currently 15th in the queue behind antman9173. I will post the review here upon completion.

Thanks for authoring,
Brian
If you would like a detailed review of your mission please visit my forum posting "In depth mission reports upon request" for details. Also see Evil 70th's list of missions at "Evil 70th's Missions".
Starfleet Veteran
Join Date: Jun 2012
Posts: 786
# 640
05-10-2013, 07:35 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by lincolninspace View Post
Hello Evil. I love your in depth reviews. Just published my first mission: A time to search by @lincolninspace. It is still under review and needs played aa few times. Thanks in advance
Hi lincolninspace,

I am glad you enjoy my reviews. Welcome to the queue. Your mission is 16th in the queue behind usmcprim. Is this mission Federation or Klingon? I will get to this mission as soon as I can and post the review here when completed.

Thanks for authoring,
Brian
If you would like a detailed review of your mission please visit my forum posting "In depth mission reports upon request" for details. Also see Evil 70th's list of missions at "Evil 70th's Missions".
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