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Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 41
03-05-2010, 12:14 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by urklvt View Post
Brother, I've been there before and was VERY glad we didn't have kids when it came time to tell her to get packing.

I know it's not only about STO, but I know how little things can become big "talking" points during those asinine arguments which are really nothing more than euphemisms and delay tactics postponing the inevitable. It's funny how we're so quick to fight yet too scared to do the right thing and move on.

Life's too short to live miserably and as a parent now I know that if it came down to it again I have the responsibility to show my son that happiness is all that matters.

It's simple. If you're unhappy, end it. The longer you wait the uglier the divorce.
Exactly, although it applies to everything in life. I've said it before- you can either complain or take action. Not happy in your current relationship? End it. Now. No questions asked. The children complicate things a bit, but what would be better for your kids? Growing up with parents who despise each other, or growing up with only one parent?
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 42
03-05-2010, 01:07 PM
With all due respect, if this game or any game, or any other purely social activity is casing problems in your relationship, drop the game. Yes, certainly there are deeper issues at work then your game play, but most likely your game play is a distraction from these real world problems, and thus contribute to the downward spiral. She is looking for an affirmation of your love, and sees the game as competition for your attention.

Kids are involved; your priority is to them. You made them; you are responsible to them above all else. Give up the game, do what you need to do to save your relationships. The game will still be here when you have repaired or completed equitable reorganization and reprioritization of you and your children's lives.

*edited for spelling and grammer
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 43
03-05-2010, 01:23 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by tlmiller10 View Post
Thankfully this is the most SANE reason my wife would have. I'm just terribly tired of raising our two children all day, running my business for someone who can't see the big picture, or ever be happy with what she has.

There is a constant tone of negativity in the home when she is around. That I cannot change, that's personal.

-Tim
maybe you should go see "doctor" phil
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 44
03-05-2010, 01:25 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by tlmiller10 View Post
I've been told, that this is a great possibility if I continue to play.

But sadly, this isn't the tip of a really nasty iceberg.

-Tim
I can understand "good" established games being the cause of a divorce, well, not really, but meh.

But over STO? Really? I gotta call shenanigans on this one.
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 45
03-05-2010, 01:29 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Daevan
Exactly, although it applies to everything in life. I've said it before- you can either complain or take action. Not happy in your current relationship? End it. Now. No questions asked. The children complicate things a bit, but what would be better for your kids? Growing up with parents who despise each other, or growing up with only one parent?
Whao Daeven, for the most part your a funny guy and I enjoy your posts, but as the Ten-Forward counsler.... you give some way bad advice. This guy needs to go back to the table and ask allot of questions before he makes up his mind to leave a relationship especially when kids are involved. No one said that this $h!t was easy, and just as people can grow apart, so can they grow together, it just takes more work.

OP, the answers you seek will not be found in Ten-forward and I urge you to take any advice you get here with a grain of salt, including my own.
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 46
03-05-2010, 01:38 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by MoonunitAlpha View Post
Whao Daeven, for the most part your a funny guy and I enjoy your posts, but as the Ten-Forward counsler.... you give some way bad advice. This guy needs to go back to the table and ask allot of questions before he makes up his mind to leave a relationship especially when kids are involved. No one said that this $h!t was easy, and just as people can grow apart, so can they grow together, it just takes more work.

OP, the answers you seek will not be found in Ten-forward and I urge you to take any advice you get here with a grain of salt, including my own.
I'll respect this, but I've seen quite a few occasions where kids grow up raised by two people who absolutely despise each other. In some cases, the parents are so focused on their petty little squabbling that they can't take the time to raise their children properly. In other cases, the children grow up shunning meaningful relationships- they don't want to end up like mommy and daddy, after all.

It's entirely possible to be a good father or mother without custody of your child. If a simple little game can bring up questions like the OP has been posing, there are some serious underlying issues. Some people simply aren't compatible. If you find yourself in a relationship with someone you simply can not tolerate, it's best to split before your bitterness and anger affect those most susceptible- the children.

...And you consider me a funny guy? Thanks, although I always thought I came across as the slightly annoying loudmouth.
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 47
03-05-2010, 01:43 PM
If someone takes their relationship advice from a game forum. Well. I can see that someone being the future recipient of a Darwin award.
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 48
03-05-2010, 01:49 PM
I have the perfect solution.

Take a nice little vacation to "rekindle" the relationship. Just the 2 of you.

Take her to Aruba. Beautiful little island. Make sure to go to the unpopulated side of the island...It's beautiful, quiet. Secluded. The water there is choppy...littered with reefs...and sharks.

They will never find her....just like that cheerleader...I swear that's where her body was dumped.
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 49
03-05-2010, 02:19 PM
In just a few days the Wife and I will celebrate 28 years together.

No relationship advice here, we know we are not the norm.

Over the years we’ve looked at a wide range of hobbies and activities to share. We’ve spent boat loads of cash on activities one or the other didn’t wind up caring for.

So far MMO’s have been one of least expensive activities we’ve tried that we both enjoy. We regularly play WoW together and have a blast.

However my Eldest Daughter is a WoW Widow so I have a clear view of that aspect of MMO’s also. Son-in-Law doesn’t want my advice on the matter so I doubt anyone here does ether.

All I can say is if you want 28 years it takes a lot of work, but in my opinion its well worth it. We’re already working towards the next 28.
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 50
03-05-2010, 02:25 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by J.Jaxin
In just a few days the Wife and I will celebrate 28 years together.

No relationship advice here, we know we are not the norm.

Over the years we’ve looked at a wide range of hobbies and activities to share. We’ve spent boat loads of cash on activities one or the other didn’t wind up caring for.

So far MMO’s have been one of least expensive activities we’ve tried that we both enjoy. We regularly play WoW together and have a blast.

However my Eldest Daughter is a WoW Widow so I have a clear view of that aspect of MMO’s also. Son-in-Law doesn’t want my advice on the matter so I doubt anyone here does ether.

All I can say is if you want 28 years it takes a lot of work, but in my opinion its well worth it. We’re already working towards the next 28.
Best post ever.
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