Would like you to give fleet 187 a look. We are a mature 18+ fleet . Our members are all very supportive of anyone. This is my first MMO and they will answer any question. We have vent which we use in game as well as for a weekly fleet meeting each Sun PM.
As to which is best for you to play. This wil depend on the situation. I have 4 characters. 2 tac and 2 eng. I have 1 from each in a cruiser and an escort. this means no one is very high, but have a ship for most situations.