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Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 101
03-10-2010, 10:41 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by SaintHazard View Post
Klingons are silly.

I have question about Klingons, Lurcita!

Do you always smoke weed and play steel drums like in the movies? Do you all really have a bobsled team? If you do, that's kind of silly! There's no ice where you come from! And what's with the funny accents? It's pronounced "man" not "mon."

Just curious!
I am confused by you, earther. Bobsled? A man mon? And what in the House of Duras is a movie??!!

As far as Ice, there is very little ice on Quo'nos. Perhaps in the mountainous regions. I'd consider it to be quite warm in my homeland.

Also, about accents....if you do not already know, Klingons have our own language. We shall teach it to you when we launch our campaign against Earth.

Signed,
Lurcita
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 102
03-10-2010, 10:57 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by K-Tar
Since you are obviously blind and unable to distinguish a human from a Klingon I guess you obviously aren't a warrior anymore. And the Hegh'bat is also used by dishonoured Klingons. You're a honourless liar by claiming that the Federation attacked the Klingon and Romulan empires. So you have two good reasons to perform it.

I didn't know that weapon exchanges between brothers are considered "dealing".... Ohhh, let me guess, you're one of those ridgeless augment-Klingons. Didn't you know we have a cure for that. Maybe you should find a good doctor on Quo'nos who can make a true Klingon out of you.



You shouldn't compare Klingons and Jamaicans. Otherwise you could find yourself impaled. Multiple times. Through multiple organs.
Dear Admiral Earther,
You are a little bit correct in this. I can tell who is Klingon but not necessarily who is Starfleet. Starfleet officers usually have their back to me as they run for dear life.

Let's discuss your brother... What is the expression that you earthers use?....OH YES "I travelled there".
Your brother, by giving a bat'leth to you is indeed an arms dealer. I am certain he did not contact the Klingon High Command for permission. It does not matter if he gave one weapon or a dozen weapons.

You agitate me like no earther has ever done in the past. Are you a relative of one James Tiberius Kirk? He was another meddlesome earther who was a thorn in our side in the past.

Your Vulcan Lapdog Admiral Spock attacked Romulas and Remis with some sort of Red Matter device. It is a pity that the Romulans are not allied with us. We would be perfectly happy to carve Earth right down the middle and share.

Your starfleet has attacked us and will attack us relentlessly. In good faith, I request that you remove all Federation warships from the Neutral Zone. Perhaps this will be a good start to mending the Federation's vast aggressions against my people.

Signed,
Lurcita of the House Kleri
Qap'La
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 103
03-10-2010, 01:32 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Zylpha
Dear Admiral Earther,
You are a little bit correct in this. I can tell who is Klingon but not necessarily who is Starfleet. Starfleet officers usually have their back to me as they run for dear life.
Funny, since I'm facing you right now your insistence on calling me an earther can only mean that your are so blind that whoever in the Klingon High Command allowed you to fly anything more dangerous than a shuttle should be shamefully executed.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Zylpha
Let's discuss your brother... What is the expression that you earthers use?....OH YES "I travelled there".
Your brother, by giving a bat'leth to you is indeed an arms dealer. I am certain he did not contact the Klingon High Command for permission. It does not matter if he gave one weapon or a dozen weapons.
Since when does a Klingon warrior need a "permission"? Do you ask the High Command for "permission" before going to the toilet? Are you a Klingon warrior or a Jem'hadar lapdog?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Zylpha
You agitate me like no earther has ever done in the past. Are you a relative of one James Tiberius Kirk? He was another meddlesome earther who was a thorn in our side in the past.
Since James Tiberius Kirk never bedded a Klingon woman I am pretty sure that this is not the case.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Zylpha
Your Vulcan Lapdog Admiral Spock attacked Romulas and Remis with some sort of Red Matter device. It is a pity that the Romulans are not allied with us. We would be perfectly happy to carve Earth right down the middle and share.
Maybe you should ask that traitor General Worf about the true story. If he has one last shred of honour in him he will maybe share it with you. Admiral Spock didn't attack Romulus but destroyed the supernova that obliterated the Romulus system and would have destroyed Quo'nos with its next eruption.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Zylpha
Your starfleet has attacked us and will attack us relentlessly. In good faith, I request that you remove all Federation warships from the Neutral Zone. Perhaps this will be a good start to mending the Federation's vast aggressions against my people.
Your chancellor has broken the peace treaties and tried to take possession of Federation space. Since the Federation is so peace-loving we will have peace when you are out of Federation territory and give up. If my opinion would matter this war would only be other when the Federation stands in the High Council on Quo'nos over J'mpoks dead body!
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 104
03-14-2010, 09:07 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by K-Tar
Funny, since I'm facing you right now your insistence on calling me an earther can only mean that your are so blind that whoever in the Klingon High Command allowed you to fly anything more dangerous than a shuttle should be shamefully executed.



Since when does a Klingon warrior need a "permission"? Do you ask the High Command for "permission" before going to the toilet? Are you a Klingon warrior or a Jem'hadar lapdog?



Since James Tiberius Kirk never bedded a Klingon woman I am pretty sure that this is not the case.



Maybe you should ask that traitor General Worf about the true story. If he has one last shred of honour in him he will maybe share it with you. Admiral Spock didn't attack Romulus but destroyed the supernova that obliterated the Romulus system and would have destroyed Quo'nos with its next eruption.



Your chancellor has broken the peace treaties and tried to take possession of Federation space. Since the Federation is so peace-loving we will have peace when you are out of Federation territory and give up. If my opinion would matter this war would only be other when the Federation stands in the High Council on Quo'nos over J'mpoks dead body!
Dear Earther,
I ask the Klingon High Command any question that deals with betrayal. Your arms dealing brother is a traitor and will be fed to the Targs when I find him. In case you do not know this, we are fighting the jem hadar. Their warships attack alongside the cardassians. I have seen it with my own eyes. I have destroyed several in battle.

I'm sure your Surian Federation President would be exremely happy with listening to your excellent diplomacy skills. You should be the one to ask for permission from your superiors.

Oh yes....after the federation's supernova destroyed the romulan homeworlds, Spock shut off the starfleet device with red matter. How very convienient. He tried to cover up his treachery....true klingons know the truth. Yet another federation superweapon.

Earther in a starfleet uniform, You do know of Khitomer, correct? Romulans took it from us. When we reclaimed it, your Starfleet began to meddle in affairs that it should never of been in. That's all the federation does... They are just like the borg. You invade our space without provocation! I guarantee you though, we shall end this conflict when we land on Earth.

Do not insult the Klingon High Command. J'mpoks is a great warrior and should not be talked of dishonorably. I should personally cut your tongue out for your insulence.

I await your staggering wit of a communique aboard my Flagship.

Signed,
Lurcita of the House Kleri
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 105
03-14-2010, 09:19 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by SaintHazard View Post
Why leave the male BOffs out? Skirts and Bat'leths for them, too!
In TNG some of the men officers did wear skirts.

If you watch 'Q Who' just before the ship separation, you see two men walking past the camera in skirt.
I'm told there's more in the later series too.


I also remember Riker learning how to use a Bat'leth with Worf and gets a broke rib, so I think us fed should use the Klingon blade
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 106
03-14-2010, 12:47 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by SpaceFork
Legend has it the reason that scene exists is there was supposed to be a sword fight but Harrison Ford was hot and tired and figured well my character wouldn't bother when he has a gun on his waste so blam.
He also was sick with and upset stomach. kept having to run to the batroom every 10 mins or some such.
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 107
03-14-2010, 02:19 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Zylpha
Dear Earther,
I ask the Klingon High Command any question that deals with betrayal. Your arms dealing brother is a traitor and will be fed to the Targs when I find him.
Since you are blind like a tiberian bat I don't think that my brother is in any danger.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Zylpha
In case you do not know this, we are fighting the jem hadar. Their warships attack alongside the cardassians. I have seen it with my own eyes. I have destroyed several in battle.
Oh, yes you're destroying a few ships that stray into Klingon territory while we actively police Cardassian space and hunt them down. I have probably killed more Jem'hadar in hand to hand combat than you have on the ships you blew up.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Zylpha
I'm sure your Surian Federation President would be exremely happy with listening to your excellent diplomacy skills. You should be the one to ask for permission from your superiors.
I already have the permission, I'm a special envoy of the Federation, and I know best how to deal with J'mpok's lapdogs.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Zylpha
Oh yes....after the federation's supernova destroyed the romulan homeworlds, Spock shut off the starfleet device with red matter. How very convienient. He tried to cover up his treachery....true klingons know the truth. Yet another federation superweapon.
True Klingons? You're a bunch of paranoid pirates, every Klingon warrior of old would be ashamed that you call yourself a Klingon.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Zylpha
Earther in a starfleet uniform, You do know of Khitomer, correct? Romulans took it from us. When we reclaimed it, your Starfleet began to meddle in affairs that it should never of been in. That's all the federation does... They are just like the borg. You invade our space without provocation! I guarantee you though, we shall end this conflict when we land on Earth.
Starfleet didn't interfere. The Federation council expressed its unhappiness with your decision to attack, because they hoped for a more lasting alliance between the three powers. Well humans... But you attacked Federation space and broke the Khitomer accords, so shut up about being attacked without provocation. And I can guarantee you the only way you would ever land on Earth is crashing into an Ocean in a burning ship.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Zylpha
Do not insult the Klingon High Command. J'mpoks is a great warrior and should not be talked of dishonorably. I should personally cut your tongue out for your insulence.
J'mpok is a dishonourable petaQ who's too good with a bat'leth. He has thrown the Empire in a senseless war while the Undine are laughing about him and the Borg are threatening the whole quadrant.
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 108
03-14-2010, 08:43 PM
Bat'leths are kewl weapons, but I hope there's more melee weapons than just the Klingon ones. I'd love to have my Security Chief take on a Klingon with a Folding Katana, like the one d in the new movie...
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 109
03-17-2010, 10:13 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chakotay317
Klingon honor is putting a fed in a corner....bash bash bash.
It is not our fault that starfleet officers, when running from a single Klingon will run into a corner. If that is where we find them cowering, then so be it....

Signed,
Lurcita
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 110
03-17-2010, 10:33 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by K-Tar
Since you are blind like a tiberian bat I don't think that my brother is in any danger.



Oh, yes you're destroying a few ships that stray into Klingon territory while we actively police Cardassian space and hunt them down. I have probably killed more Jem'hadar in hand to hand combat than you have on the ships you blew up.



I already have the permission, I'm a special envoy of the Federation, and I know best how to deal with J'mpok's lapdogs.



True Klingons? You're a bunch of paranoid pirates, every Klingon warrior of old would be ashamed that you call yourself a Klingon.



Starfleet didn't interfere. The Federation council expressed its unhappiness with your decision to attack, because they hoped for a more lasting alliance between the three powers. Well humans... But you attacked Federation space and broke the Khitomer accords, so shut up about being attacked without provocation. And I can guarantee you the only way you would ever land on Earth is crashing into an Ocean in a burning ship.



J'mpok is a dishonourable petaQ who's too good with a bat'leth. He has thrown the Empire in a senseless war while the Undine are laughing about him and the Borg are threatening the whole quadrant.
The Federation has no business dealing in Klingon affairs of state. We were recovering property that was taken away from us by the Romulans. Unless the Federation empire is somehow in league with the Romulans, then they should go back to meddling in the affairs of backwards pre-warp technology cultures and leave Klingon Controlled Sectors.

You are an ambassador for the Federation. Tell your superiors to leave what you consider to be the neutral zone. You have no business there!

The Undine.....those shapeshifting cowards....love the federation. But be aware that they have a goal. Do you not remember the changelings who crafted a horrendous copy of our great leader Martok? Do you not think that the Undine will do the same with your federation?? Even now, they are probably taking positions of power within your entire network and you fools do not realize it.

We Klingons have seen this before, but the minds of Starfleet are those of a ghuH !!
When your Federation falls to the Undine, do not come crying to us like useless tera'ngan.

Signed,
Lurcita of the House Kleri
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