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Posts: 120
# 71
02-26-2010, 10:17 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ravenstein View Post
Proper Female Earthican Battle Dress consists of Short Skirts and Katanas.

This combination is much superior to the Klingon...things...as the skirt presents much greater mobility to allow for flanking attacks while the Katana does not look like something made an intoxicated, novice smith who has never seen a real fight in his life.

I mean seriously, it bows inward. Why would you do that with a weapon? At least if it arches outward it could be used for slashing. But as it is for a straight thrust you need to get with nibbling range. I mean if if your opponent had a dagger it would be in your gut before the inward bowing made impact.

And the way you swing it around your body, it's like you want to loose a hand. Or ear. And those sharp, spiky bits on the tip? Why would you swing it around like that. You would be concentrating more on not taking off your own hand then on fighting the other guy.

No thanks on the funky weapon. Gimme a sword. Straight and to the point, if you catch my drift.
You said it, Ravenstein!! Regular Swords beat Bat'leths any day!!

I may use a Bat'leth at the moment, but that is only because I do not have access to my trusty Shishioh Blade. I hope Starfleet procurement can fix this situation as soon as possible.
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Posts: 120
# 72
03-01-2010, 10:45 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by KiraYamato
You said it, Ravenstein!! Regular Swords beat Bat'leths any day!!

I may use a Bat'leth at the moment, but that is only because I do not have access to my trusty Shishioh Blade. I hope Starfleet procurement can fix this situation as soon as possible.
The Bat'leth is a weapon of Honor. It is a spiritual weapon that was used to its fullest extent by Kahless the Unforgetable. The weapon is an extension of every true Klingon. There are better weapons, but none as sacred as the Bat'leth; and should not be used by those who do not understand its spirituality.

However, Bat'leths do make short work of your combat engineers...

Signed,
Lurcita of the House Kleri
Qap'La
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# 73
03-01-2010, 11:02 AM
Unfortunately, Starfleet has not authorized the use of any melee weapons beyond our fists and the Bat'leths of our fallen enemies.

I don't want to break a nail, thus...
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# 74
03-01-2010, 11:04 AM
[quote=Zylpha]I, Lurcita, of the Houst of Kleri have a dispute!

When hunting down the enemies of Quo'nos during a ground expedition, I noticed two shocking things:

1) I saw a federation officer wielding a bat'leth (clearly of DS-9 type quality). To know that some of our Klingon bretheren have decided to become Federation lapdogs is a complete embarrassment. Their lands must be ceased immediately...but I digress.

I get my bat'leths from my younger brother who still lives on Quo'nos. But don't worry, we're not nobility, we're soldiers. That means we actually work for getting command of a ship and have no lands for your kind to confiscate.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Zylpha
A bat'leth should NEVER be misused by an earther nor a dishonorable klingon. It is an honored weapon...and extension of every true Klingon's body. Earthers and klingon swill should be honored to die to a true Klingon who wields a bat-leth on them. Any federation officer or lapdog with a bat-leth dishonors our spiritual weapon of choice. I killed the wielder and will personally hunt down any other earthers who steal from my culture.
Bah, an ally of criminals and pirates dares to tell me what honour is? Any Starfleet officer has more honour than all the races in the Klingon Empire put together. Get rid of your pirate and smuggler friends and learn to keep your treaties, when I will maybe consider that you have the slightest idea of what "honour" means.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Zylpha
2) It is a disgrace, as a Klingon woman, to see earthers wearing....short skirts. Every woman should, at the maximum, show short sleeved shirts or very minimal cleavage. During one of my....ground explorations, I discovered an earther wearing a short skirt. I had to personally dispatch of her myself. I do not fault her for being a loathesome Federation earther....but to wear a skirt as a common hussie is a disgrace to all women.

This outrage will not be tolerated!
If you can't stand short skirts on earth women you should think about taking your eyes out with a bat'leth when seeing the loincloths of the Orion *****s you have on Quo'nos.

Signed,

Admiral Korrek of the USS Cochise.
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# 75
03-01-2010, 11:20 AM
Such a foolish ideology you Klingon cowards have, all you do is hide with your cloaking devices and sneak about, you are just like the romulans

at least they admit they are sneaky

all you speak of is Honor, where is the honor in an ambush, it requires little skill and shows as much bravery as a common house cat

Your species will die in battle but through your dishonor no longer be sent to Sto'Vo'Kor

Now i must return to my plans to Dominate Starfleet from within, i have wasted enough time on the Klingons
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Posts: 120
# 76
03-01-2010, 12:05 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Zylpha
Be sure that they do not take your Battleship.

Personally, I enjoy the Bird of Prey that I have. It resembles my hunting etiquette. I strike when a Federation ship feels it is safe. Until Klingon boots land on Earth, no Federation warship will ever be safe. Klingon Expansion must continue.

Signed,
Lurcita of the House Kleri
"Hunting etiquette"? You will forgive me, I hope, if I take a moment to chuckle at your foolishness.

My race is, at best, and uneasy ally of the Federation. Why? Because we're hunters, and we're not picky about what, or who, we eat.

Klingons boast and brag about being honorable warriors and great hunters. They are neither. Honorable warriors do not hide behind cloaks and ambush their targets, that is what hunters do. Great hunters do not pretend to honor or silly rules, that is what warriors do.

You have taken the worst of both, and are weaker for it. My people do not worry about honor when hunting, we worry about food in our bellies and survival. We are hunters, and make no claims otherwise.

Someday, maybe, your people will realize their error and correct it. On that day, they may truely become as great as they think they are. Until then, just be thankful that Klingon leaves a foul aftertaste in our mouths.

I will admit, though, that you have a point about the clothing. The "miniskirt" appears to be designed to provide as little coverage as possible while hampering movement. I have no idea why these things are so popluar, and would never wear one.

Until we meet on the hunting fields;
Nyrei, Huntleader of the Tanner Clan
First Officer of the U.S.S. Gmork

P.S.: I have shown this to my Captain. He has recovered a few of your honorable weapons from various Gorn he's taken out in hand to hand combat. He will attempt to send them back to you, and asks that you please send more Gorn into combat against us in reply. I hope you do so, as I'm still a few teeth short of a full necklace.
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# 77
03-01-2010, 12:38 PM
While the argument regarding a miniskirt and the lack of protection in melee situation is somewhat amusing, the simple truth of the matter is that the majority of combat is done at range. With energy weapons. Weapons for which attire makes no difference whatsoever. Bat'leth combat may be fine for a duel, but on the battlefield it is ... impractical. Perhaps the Klingon Empire would fare better if the sent troops in with extra ammunition, rather than a weapon just slightly less practical than a bayonet.

In "A Book of Five Rings", by Miyamoto Musashi (written in 1645 a.d.), there is one particular piece of wisdom that has left a lasting impression upon me. From "The Ground Book", I give you the following excerpt:
"You should not have a favourite weapon. To become over-familiar with one weapon is as much a fault as not knowing it sufficiently well. You should not copy others, but use weapons which you can handle properly. It is bad for commanders and troopers to have likes and dislikes. These are things you must learn thoroughly."
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# 78
03-01-2010, 06:23 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chalybos View Post
Perhaps the Klingon Empire would fare better if the sent troops in with extra ammunition, rather than a weapon just slightly less practical than a bayonet.
A bayonet is orders of magnitude more practical than a bat'leth. It does not, in fact, get more practical than a bayonet in terms of melee solutions for riflemen.

Of course, a melee solution would not be required at all if anyone in Star Trek knew what an automatic weapon was. Considering the 'tactics' on display, Starfleet could become an unstoppable ground combat juggernaught simply by having a phaser equivalent of submachine guns and squad support weapons. Klingons in particular have a preference for slapping a 'hose me down' sign on their chest.
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Posts: 120
# 79
03-04-2010, 11:47 AM
[quote=K-Tar]
Quote:
Originally Posted by Zylpha
I, Lurcita, of the Houst of Kleri have a dispute!

When hunting down the enemies of Quo'nos during a ground expedition, I noticed two shocking things:

1) I saw a federation officer wielding a bat'leth (clearly of DS-9 type quality). To know that some of our Klingon bretheren have decided to become Federation lapdogs is a complete embarrassment. Their lands must be ceased immediately...but I digress.

I get my bat'leths from my younger brother who still lives on Quo'nos. But don't worry, we're not nobility, we're soldiers. That means we actually work for getting command of a ship and have no lands for your kind to confiscate.



Bah, an ally of criminals and pirates dares to tell me what honour is? Any Starfleet officer has more honour than all the races in the Klingon Empire put together. Get rid of your pirate and smuggler friends and learn to keep your treaties, when I will maybe consider that you have the slightest idea of what "honour" means.



If you can't stand short skirts on earth women you should think about taking your eyes out with a bat'leth when seeing the loincloths of the Orion *****s you have on Quo'nos.

Signed,

Admiral Korrek of the USS Cochise.
Dear Admiral Korrek,
Your communique has been received by my flagship. It has taken me a couple days to respond without stiffling a roar of laughter. You have a brother on Quo'nos?? Clearly one that aids the federation. Your words betray the actions of this arms trader. For two days, I have been trying to find this traitor to the Empire.... I have not had any luck....but rest assured, I shall find him. When I do, he shall meet with my bat-leth's blade. Tell your brother to run to starfleet before I hunt him out.

The Orions.....I am glad that you have mentioned them. LItterally, yesterday, I was walking through our shipyard and I saw one selling warship consoles. I was appalled by what I saw.... Furthermore, I was shocked by myself. My anger toward the traitorous Picard and the mistreating of females of your Federation have clouded my mind from these scantily clad Orion tricksters. Perhaps when a Klingon woman is allowed to sit as a member of the Klingon High Council, we will demand that certain types of clothing from our Orion allies are modified. Most of my time is away from my dear Quo'nos.... Only yesterday, after my return home, did I fully realize the distress that my homeworld is in.

I wish that I did not agree with you, earther Admiral... To agree with you would be to draw a line between our great Klingon Empire and the Orions. It's bad enough that we deal with the Feren....oh nevermind about that last statement.

Lastly, I must address your grossly inaccurate statement of Klingons not being honorable. Klingons do not fight just to fight. We fight to bring honor to each of our Houses; and to our empire. If your brother would stop giving our weapons to the enemies of Quo'nos and try to learn more about our culture, perhaps he could be used to educate the dull minds of starfleet officers like yourself. Perhaps then, I would not have to kill him for his treachery.

The Federation is less than honorable. While they state that they want to promote peace, they do the complete opposite. Peace to the Federation is the annilation of Klingon Expansion, and hence the Klingon Empire. This can not be tolerated.... We shall not fall like the Romulans did at the hands of the Federation Vulcan Spock. He is example of what the Federation would do to my precious Empire if given half the chance. One "Peaceful" Vulcan destroyed both Romulan homeworlds.


Signed,
Lurcita of the House Kleri
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# 80
03-04-2010, 12:09 PM
Heh. That close quarters battle stuff is for the birds. Give me a torp launcher and 8 klicks any day of the week.

Miniskirts forever, though....

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