<<From The Cpatains Office>>
Either the transporter chief is sexist or starfleet has really messed up on the transporter software.
Now that i wear a skirt as part of my uniform i have noticed that it transports last if i am beaming in or first if i am beaming out. Now i am sure that this is hilariously funny to the engineering crew but as your captain i do not want to show my tribble pouch to all and sundry whenever i transport.
If it keeps happening i will be firing you out of the torpedo tubes...