Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 1 Surrounded
10-02-2011, 02:44 PM
Starfleet has received reports of Borg activity in the Cestus system.
They order you and your ship to immediately set course for the Cestus system, where you will rendezvous with elements of Task Force Omega.




General information.
  • Level: 46+
  • Approximate duration: 30 to 40 minutes
  • Language: English
  • Faction: Federation

This mission includes:
  • Space Combat.
  • Ground Combat.
  • Many dialogs.
  • Optional objectives in each of the maps.
  • Puzzles with mixed results according to the deciciones taken by the captain.
  • Maps completely original.


Thanks to KineticImpulser, AnthonyUK and Darius for helping me to correct grammatical errors.
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 2
10-02-2011, 04:30 PM
Good mission! Thanks for translating it from The Original Klingon!
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 3
10-02-2011, 05:28 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by KineticImpulser
Good mission! Thanks for translating it from The Original Klingon!
And i just finished to add your corrections. Man, you worked hard for someone who do not know. I have to words to thank you.
If this project has any future, is thanks, in big part to you.
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 4
10-03-2011, 08:10 AM
Another trailer for the mission:
Feedback is more than welcome!

Thanks.
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 5
10-05-2011, 07:19 AM
Some screenshots of my mission:







Just give it a try and let me know what you think.

Thank you.
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 6
10-05-2011, 02:33 PM
A very enjoyable mission.

A good TNG style depiction of the Borg and my favourite depiction of MACOs in the current century.. tough professional soldiers in uber fashionable uniforms Doing a shuttle borne landing assault against the borg with these guys was definitely the highlight for me.

Alot of care and work went into this. The maps were particularly impressive and had alot of cool little features that made it fun just to wander around taking in the atmosphere. (Easter eggs and optional dialogs to provide extra background are very much my cup of tea, but maybe not everyone's.)

To me the shuttle bay and final ship interior were fantastic.

Well worth a play (especially for any other authors who appreciate foundry map innovation.)
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 7
10-09-2011, 04:32 AM
Great Mission. Too much Borg-Shoot at the starting but at later progress a nice and interesting Storyline. I liked how you put in you character's personal file and your ships specifications. In addition I liked how you have done the interiours. Good work!
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 8
10-10-2011, 12:25 PM
Thank you guys for the feedback, is mach apprisiated!

And by the way, I just re-publish the mission with a update of one of the maps, where you can choose what type of map you want for the type of ship you use.

Hope you enjoy it!
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
# 9
10-15-2011, 11:50 AM
Another screenshot of the mission:



Just give it a try and let me know what you think.
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Posts: 120
Federation Mission - Surrounded
Author: Cerritouru
Allegiance: Federation
ST - HR84VX306

----------Report Start-----------

Summary: First of all I want to start off by saying how much I enjoyed your work. Your maps are simply stunning. The dialog was well written and drives the story along drawing me into it and making me want to see more. This mission is one of the best and one of the few that I’ve given five stars to. Despite the few minor dialog errors I list below your work on the story and maps made the whole thing.

As I said in my rating critique on STO following the mission I am looking forward to the second half of this mission and to playing more of your work in the future. You have done an outstanding job on this one. Keep up the great work and thanks for authoring.

Mission Description: Good description with explanation in advance of English as second language.

Grant Mission Dialog: Good mission grant dialog. Very detailed story dialog.

Mission Task: Very clear.

Mission Entry Prompt: Good entry dialog and button.

MAPS:
Cestus System: You designed a good map with balanced fighting and great story dialog. Here are some recommended dialog corrections:
-Dialog for SS Rushak; should read "lost the signal" vice "loss the signal". Also "There ships more prepared" should read "Their ships will be better prepared".
-Dialog near planet; "I can't take any clear reading" should read, "I can't get a clear reading". Button response should read "know" vice "knew".
-Dialog near planet; "It was build" should read "It was built". Response button; "But can also be a trap" should read "But it could also be a trap".
-Dialog near planet; "person that send" should read "person that sent". Also "using a shuttlecraft" should read "taking a shuttlecraft".

Shuttlebay: Your map and dialog was excellent. The optional information on the ships consoles was very helpful and I loved the way you allowed the selection of the type of shuttle bay.

Cestus Colony: The map design, particularly the buildings is really good. The dialog was well written as well and drove the story forward.

Underground Facility: The map design was very well done. The dialog was excellent and drove the story. The choice of how to resolve the mission was quite well written. Here are some recommended dialog corrections:
-Dialog with Commander button; "How do you" should read "How did you".
-Dialog with Ensign Tontin button "How do you" should read "How did you".
-Dialog from Tactical Officer; "I don't think that is likely" should read "I don't think it is likely". Also “Borg give us” should read “Borg will give us”. The dialog “emergency generators to sickbay” should read “emergency generators in sickbay”. The dialog “increasing the consume” should read “increasing the consumption”.

Starbase 82: The map was good and the dialog was great. Especially the detailed personnel file of the Captain of the Atrigas. Well done. Here is a recommended dialog correction:
-Dialog with Admiral; "listen what she has to said" should read "listen to what she has to say".

USS Artigas: This was a great map and the story dialog was excellent. The dialog draws the story to a good conclusion with the teaser for a follow on mission that makes me look forward to it. Here are some recommended dialog corrections:
-Dialog with the cadet; she referred to me by rank and short name vice rank and last name.
-Dialog with the Captain; she also referred to me by rank and short name.
-Dialog with Captain button; “something to inform me?” should read “something to tell me?” or perhaps “you wished to see me?”
-Dialog with the Captain; “have in our disposal” should read “have at our disposal”. Also “for caming aboard” should read “for coming aboard”

---------End Report----------

Thanks again for authoring. You did a great job and I look forward to the second half of this mission and playing any of your missions in the future.
Brian
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