Starting point on Bajor:
- (note) When you need to start with listning to the babble, you get "Begin :". I have the feeling : is kind of misplaced
Map one, Temple:
- (note) My first thought was... what happened? Nothing... Then i turned around and saw the fog. Something so simple but with an awesome effect. Nicely done!!
- (note) Have you actually studied some of the episodes with prophets talking? Not bad!
- (suggestion) While the Prophets talking was a highlight, getting the "Go to Next Map" option was something like *oh*...
Map two, Back again:
- (typo) The Propets gave you a task <= prophets
Secondary starting point:
- (note) When you want to continue, you get another :
- (question) "... he has given us transporter coordinates to meet him at, when..." <= where?
Map three, Caves:
- (typo) "...Those may have hoped aboard transport..." <= you mean hopped aboard?
- (note) Lots of Continue's in the dialogs
- (grammer) "this cave use to be a mine" <= don't you mean used to be?
- (typo) i had the felling <= feeling
- (grammer) i use to play <= i used to
- (note) A warp-out/warp-in animation with anjohl when you're finished with the dialog?
- (typo) New Romulaus == New Romulus
- (note) Interesting way how you build up this map!
- (note) No animation when you are trying to open the second door.
- (note) "Interact" when interacting with consoles, you know you can change the title of object/dialogs too? This can be done at the object itself (Triggers or something)
- (note) Nicely done with the four consoles!
- (note) When placing the explosives, you don't see the actual explosive being added.
- (typo) The buildup the == They buildup the?
- (note) Interesting dialogs with the consoles on either sides. Oh and i had to deactivate... rock?
Map four, The planets:
- (note) what happens.. AWESOME.
- (note) i am someone who isn't really a fan of in-game warp's, you've done it pretty well. Congrats.
- (note) when you need to warp to bajor, you do a warp-out animation which is unnecessary. Oh and again "To next map".
Maps: Excellent work on the explosion effects, very nice indeed. Warping is also done well and the Prophet's Hathon is nice - though very underused. WOuld be good if you could make better use of it as a setting.
Story: Not much development of characters or choice in interaction. Only a small glimpse of plot element so far. I'd personally like more development of characters and plot teasers at this point.
IsItTrek: Too early in story to say but nothing directly contradicting.
Thank you isthisscience and stoutes for playing my mission. At the time of this post the mission is being re-published with fixes:
* Grammar and spelling Errors corrected (Mentioned by stoutes)
* Enter Maps through Cryptic doors now say :
> Begin : Epohhs
> Continue : Epohhs
* First Room Console Puzzle - Fake Consoles no longer have default Dialog and now trigger Dialog bubbles which allow Interact Text to be changed and Interact Animation.
* Explosive Device has been add (Plant Explosive Objective)
* Fake Generators Interactions has been disabled after player finds Correct Generator
* Invisible walls added inside cage to prevent player from accessing console
* Interact and Dialog added at cage to inform player how to remove cage
* Dialog added after cage has been removed to inform player the removal of cage
* Removal of Warp-Out Animation when leaving Space Map to Bajor
Note to stoutes :
While the Prophets talking was a highlight, getting the "Go to Next Map" option was something like *oh*...
When I have player leave my map(s) back to Cryptic Maps, I am unable to change the dialog and button text for map transfer.
I reviewed it on Episode 123 of Podcast UGC, titled "What Happens in Vegas ... Isn't Happening Here".
I am a Cheestah.
Check out my Foundry missions
Fed: "To Helna and Back", "Rema Donna", "Animations with Helna", "Mudd's Weapons", "Waiting for Wednesday", "Monolith"
KDF: "Time the Enemy", "Time the Ally", "Time the Traitor"