Captain
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 3,697
# 131
10-02-2013, 04:03 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by gulberat View Post
To address a few points:

1) It is never stated that Alyosha never had to take an absence on a different day due to his religion.
Alyosha's religious practices were irrelevant. The issue under complaint was Gerstein, and should have solely addressed Gerstein's practices, not gone down the route of "Well I'm religious, I dare you to find fault with me, and because I'm your superior officer, I'll end your career if you have..." which was how Alyosha came across in that instance. Of course, everyone has their bad days... In Immaculate Perception, S'rR's was acting like a brat until T'Reya put her in her place and made her get over herself



Quote:
Originally Posted by gulberat View Post
2) It is clear from Smith's discussion with another officer that news of Arkos' complaint had "gone viral." Had the incident been wholly private between Arkos and the senior staff, it might not have been as severe in nature, but with it being public, the result is Gerstein being "called out" in front of everyone. This is the very definition of harassment and a hostile work environment and is not something to be treated as a routine matter or a mere nuisance. The complaint, being made public, is in and of itself an act of aggression.

With that being said...I did find myself wondering if Smith might end up getting some blowback offscreen from this situation as well. I was a bit surprised to receive the prologue that had Smith setting up Arkos with no idea as to what he was walking into--and then discussing it after Arkos left the room, with a random officer.
Ahh, now this revelation rather changes the context... The complaint should only have been between those directly affected by it, not turned into scuttlebutt... It sounds like Smith needs a bit of a speaking too as well about workplace etiquette...


Quote:
Originally Posted by gulberat View Post
3) Arkos was never asked to convert to theistic belief, nor was the suggestion even made, and as later stories prove, he never did and likely never will. The broadbrushing and stereotypes were what needed to stop.
No, he was not, but, he was essentially told "You must respect this person, you may not hold the opinion you hold on them." As I said above, that is in itself an intolerant viewpoint, so an irony given the context it appeared ^_^



Quote:
Originally Posted by gulberat View Post
4) Teeglar has almost zero mercy, especially when he sees a record of prior incidents. It was either take drastic measures to make Arkos straighten up and fly right immediately, or Teeglar likely would have written Arkos up or outright sanctioned him, and it likely would have been career-derailing. There was not going to be a second chance. This would be bad not just for Arkos, but also for Starfleet. For Arkos to be where he is after only two years is extraordinary. This is a talent to be saved (career-wise) at damn near any cost.

I can see the point that had we developed further background on these incidents, rather than a single line or two, the sense of a last ditch effort where prior, more traditional performance counseling of the sort some of you describe had failed, would have come across more clearly and might have explained better why Alyosha felt that he had to do what he did in order to avert what may well have been the imminent destruction of Arkos' career. I saw it as almost like this: if a child is about to stick his or her finger in an outlet, and shouting, "No!" until you're blue in the face doesn't work, you're finally left with no choice but to slap the child's hand away in order to keep him or her from getting a potentially lethal shock. Even a parent who abhors spanking, I think, would take this action.

While ambassadormollari and I knew that career derailment was the potential consequence due to those past offenses, and the context for Alyosha's actions, it seems that without actually reading out a detailed list of all of Arkos' iprior ncidents, and their nature, it was not something that all readers perceived with such a sense of danger and immediacy.
I agree, with deeper background context, that might have come across better, and indeed, from those examples, it probably should have been a career-ending situation (which of course, the situation did not allow for due to Arkos' future, but would have for any other officer ) which required that kind of shock treatment... It's a bit like the aforementioned 'interview' between Amanda and Mr Cornish... He's likely going to be wandering Spacedock for quite some time, unless he decides to just do the universe a favour and hang himself in his closet

Quote:
Originally Posted by gulberat View Post
5) I imagine everyone knew this--but no actions were taken during the meeting without ambassadormollari and I without both of us OK'ing it. What you saw between the characters should not be inferred to transfer in any way to "real life" between AM and me. ;-)
I never thought otherwise
Captain
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 1,759
# 132
10-02-2013, 06:55 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by marcusdkane View Post
Ahh, now this revelation rather changes the context... The complaint should only have been between those directly affected by it, not turned into scuttlebutt... It sounds like Smith needs a bit of a speaking too as well about workplace etiquette...
It was there in the story, right after Arkos left the room.

I do think that Smith should not have encouraged further discussion once it became evident to her that others knew. I can't imagine Teeglar will like that degree of "relaxed" command when he finds out, and as a senior officer I doubt the option will be allowed to not get at least a butt-chewing direct from him.

Of course (ironically), that is not a matter that would be raised during the discussion with Arkos--though you might have noticed a hint that Alyosha wasn't entirely pleased with her.

Quote:
I agree, with deeper background context, that might have come across better, and indeed, from those examples, it probably should have been a career-ending situation (which of course, the situation did not allow for due to Arkos' future, but would have for any other officer ) which required that kind of shock treatment...
I do imagine that especially with the galaxy heading towards multi-front war, Starfleet would not wish to lose its most talented--prodigies, even. Even worse should someone defect and actively give that talent to an enemy cause. There would be no reason for Arkos to do the latter. But I am fairly sure retention was getting a lot of focus. I hate to use the Wesley example, but Arkos' stated learning pace and rate of acquisition made it clear he was very much in the same category. Losing a being like that was a significant loss in "Journey's End" that clearly no one would like to repeat. Hence the choice to keep trying where conventional methods failed.

The extent of Arkos' talents was discussed--but apparently missed. :-/


Quote:
I never thought otherwise
In past experiences I have seen the worst-case scenario with co-authoring or round robins, where it got adversarial and personal, so I felt it bore mentioning that this was not the case here.

Christian Gaming Community Fleets--Faith, Fun, and Fellowship! See the website and PM for more. :-)

Proudly F2P. Sig by gulberat. Avatar by balsavor.deviantart.com

Last edited by gulberat; 10-02-2013 at 06:58 AM.
Captain
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 3,697
# 133
10-02-2013, 08:00 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by gulberat View Post
It was there in the story, right after Arkos left the room.
Ahh, I have to admit, I didn't pick up on the subtext as to 'the talk' referring to it being something everyone but Arkos knew about, and simply thought Dell thought he was going to get 'a talk' from Alyosha...


Quote:
Originally Posted by gulberat View Post
I do think that Smith should not have encouraged further discussion once it became evident to her that others knew. I can't imagine Teeglar will like that degree of "relaxed" command when he finds out, and as a senior officer I doubt the option will be allowed to not get at least a butt-chewing direct from him.

Of course (ironically), that is not a matter that would be raised during the discussion with Arkos--though you might have noticed a hint that Alyosha wasn't entirely pleased with her.
Yes, that definitely came across that he was not impressed with her



Quote:
Originally Posted by gulberat View Post
I do imagine that especially with the galaxy heading towards multi-front war, Starfleet would not wish to lose its most talented--prodigies, even. Even worse should someone defect and actively give that talent to an enemy cause. There would be no reason for Arkos to do the latter. But I am fairly sure retention was getting a lot of focus. I hate to use the Wesley example, but Arkos' stated learning pace and rate of acquisition made it clear he was very much in the same category. Losing a being like that was a significant loss in "Journey's End" that clearly no one would like to repeat. Hence the choice to keep trying where conventional methods failed.

The extent of Arkos' talents was discussed--but apparently missed. :-/
I picked up on Arkos' swift learning curve, but after his descriptions of the Federation, would not have considered him a 'flight risk', as he was clearly so grateful to have been taken in as a freestanding citizen


Quote:
Originally Posted by gulberat View Post
In past experiences I have seen the worst-case scenario with co-authoring or round robins, where it got adversarial and personal, so I felt it bore mentioning that this was not the case here.
I guess I've been lucky with my collaborations, as I've never experienced that
Career Officer
Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 3,529
# 134
10-02-2013, 12:20 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by marcusdkane View Post
I don't think that'll keep Rusty out of New Zealand But inappropriate is good, it makes for interesting reading Makes for interesting writing too -- I didn't even know about Marcus and T'Reya until I started writing that scene, and then BAM, all this stuff about her abusive ex comes out too, so I think there's definitely something to be said for pushing a characterFrom time to time to see what happens That said, I would say Georgia is anything but vulnerable. Sure, her home and family are history, but she's no victim, but a survivor, and knew what she wanted from the first time she met Jesu, and again with Rusty. I certainly wouldn't've called her vulnerable at all
I think you're right there about Georgia. Not vulnerable, but definitely needy. I think as I keep exploring Rusty's issues, he may turn out to be the vulnerable one here. His character is definitely begging for my attention right now, and I think he's ready to invite me in to more of his darker side.

"Look at all the pretty lights!"

The Masterverse Timeline / Ten Forward Fanfics
Captain
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 3,697
# 135
10-02-2013, 01:32 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by sander233 View Post
I think you're right there about Georgia. Not vulnerable, but definitely needy. I think as I keep exploring Rusty's issues, he may turn out to be the vulnerable one here. His character is definitely begging for my attention right now, and I think he's ready to invite me in to more of his darker side.
Maybe that could be something for LC51 It will be interesting to see if Georgia indeed develops a relationship with Rusty, or if she's simply going for him as he's 'exotic and different', and was to then turn her attention to someone else... Indeed, I certainly think she has the potential to play Rusty pretty badly...

PS With regards T'Reya's ex, Scolak, he 'was mauled by a sehlat while making a pilgrimage across the Forge'... (and named for my favourite beverage )

Last edited by marcusdkane; 10-02-2013 at 01:35 PM.
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Nov 2012
Posts: 157
# 136
10-02-2013, 10:00 PM
Big thank you to those who've given feedback! Only by knowing what others think can I improve!

Been a bit tardy with giving feedback of my own....I blame 2 things: hospital wifi was spotty and dropping too much, driving me absolutely batty, and certain medical procedures can leave one....fatigued. ( Too fatigued to read? Yep. Life sucks sometimes. Not fair, either. You'd think that PTSD and physical disabilities were enough...no...nature's going for the trifecta on me. I either have really, really bad luck, or did really, really bad things in a prior life. Bad, like making people buy multiple copies of Blu-Ray movies because each copy has different special features. But I digress...)

I will do my best to catch up and give my two cents.

And I may give the crew of the Bonaventure some time off....if one writes when in pain...that's all that's gonna come though on the page. And I'd like to spare you from hopping on the pity party bus that any entry I write might become.

But I look forward to the awesome tales y'all tell!
Lt. Commander
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 195
# 137
10-06-2013, 05:03 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by patrickngo View Post
Milandare: you made me laugh. The whole story moves with the goofy speed of a silent movie-and you made me laugh. "Drake Franklin" lol
Thanks! I guess that means it's easy to visualise, albeit melodramatic with short scenes Very pleased you found it funny. I had hoped to finish with a dramatic battle scene. Sander suggested I could send a clone and I also needed a hologram for an extremely fast response. At that point the story could only go wrong.

Quote:
Originally Posted by sander233 View Post
@milandare - I'm really enjoying what you're doing with Nicci, and Erred, and everyone who crosses their path. (especially a "Drake.") Also, the "age" question was hilarious.

"Take that, cruel world!" BZZZT! - also hilarious.
Thanks too! 'Experiential age' took a fair bit time to research on memory-alpha. The last measure shouldn't have been there. I was avoiding parody, but that one I couldn't resist. Writing is made easier when the borrowed characters already have such a rich history. So thank you too!


I managed to read a few stories before work consumed me again:

Quote:
Originally Posted by jaelk View Post
Let me know if you want to read more on this story as I'm happy to post in future challenges if there is interest.
By all means build on your world! I guess it's easiest if a submission works as an independent story, for anyone who hasn't kept up with your events, but overlapping characters eventually make the stories deeper and more familiar. @masopw's story struck me that way.

@dariuslorelei: The USS Saintchrist sure seems suitably persecuted! And by Rom(ul)ans no less! Good to see they're not all bad. Some ?'s, but they seem unavoidable.

@rextorvan36: Often left not knowing what the characters are talking about. Once I got past that though, the momentum really picked up and I enjoyed it very much! It finished almost too suddenly. Perhaps it is a work in progress. Some ?'s and ?"s.

@masopw: Fantastic channeling of the cast personalities! Again I was lost a lot with regards to what was happening, but I didn't really mind thanks to the voices in my head. The writing really pulls you along into the flow. Gratuitous use of famous cast members was great. I think I need to read more of your stories (I did recall reading something with L'naas split four ways). Surreal themes running through both tales.

@azniadeet: Great storytelling! Nice little evil touch from Deet at the end. I like the crew images too, it has a movie credits feel at the end.
Captain
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 3,228
# 138
11-29-2013, 10:44 AM
Finally! I made this LC harder than it should have been ...

Cast for crew:
Kathryn Beringer - Rachel Nichols

Anthi Ythysi - Katheryn Winnick

Karl Melango - Jeremy Renner

Thel Ythysi - Kevin Sorbo

S'Rel - Morena Baccarin

Bur'ar - David Ramsey

Ian McKinnon - named but not seen

Not named in story but present in the scene:
Omazei - Malin Ackerman-

Christa Harrington - Emily Bett Rickards
Kathryn S. Beringer - The Dawn Patrol

Solaris build - Veritatum Liquido Cernene
Captain
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 3,697
# 139
11-29-2013, 02:46 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by cmdrscarlet View Post
Finally! I made this LC harder than it should have been ...

Cast for crew:
Kathryn Beringer - Rachel Nichols

Anthi Ythysi - Katheryn Winnick

Karl Melango - Jeremy Renner

Thel Ythysi - Kevin Sorbo

S'Rel - Morena Baccarin

Bur'ar - David Ramsey

Ian McKinnon - named but not seen

Not named in story but present in the scene:
Omazei - Malin Ackerman-

Christa Harrington - Emily Bett Rickards
Looking forward to seeing more of the new recruits
Captain
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 3,228
# 140
11-29-2013, 02:57 PM
Thank you for reading!

S'Rel and Bur'ar are my Ground Away Team. I've built my Bridge Officers to handle Space *or* Ground combat instead of packing their abilities to do both. this helps keep Solaris as my solo-play ship and Hiketeia as my STF ship. Man, if the Excelsior had either a universal BOff slot, or substitute

So, they may show up in a LC or not, but I definitely wanted to set them up while also knocking out a previous LC. Come to think of it, I think S'Rel has already been used. Bur'ar would have been in the The Brig LC, but I decided at the 11th hour against it.

*breathes in*

LC 8 next!
Kathryn S. Beringer - The Dawn Patrol

Solaris build - Veritatum Liquido Cernene
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