After lunch today, I got on the elevator to go back to my office. As usual, there were a few strangers on board. They had no idea that the combadge on my shirt was non-functional.
Anyway, when we passed the 8th floor, an anomaly appeared in the corner of the elevator cab. Someone asked me to contact my science officer to scan it. I couldn't admit that the combadge didn't work. It would have totally broken the immersion on the elevator. I quickly got off at the next stop -- which wasn't even my floor -- just to spare myself the humiliation.
If you read the packaging carefully you'll notice the "Batteries not included" line in the small print. Your Comm Badge requires 3 AAAE triple dylithium tricobalt declathium batteries, which should be available at any corner store in the 25th century.
THAT right there, THAT line... it just made me a customer for life. I love you.
I've found having moobs prevents me from slapping it correctly. It sets up an oscillation that cancels out the signal frequency. I tried inverting the frequency of the capacitor to compensate for the subspace radiation my moobs emit, but no luck.